Hymn Time

My kids sing worship songs all the time.  Lately their favorite is from Kari Jobe- Light of the World.
But there is something amazing about hymns.  They are so rich with Scriptural depth, understanding, and wisdom.  They are songs that last forever in our hearts because of that depth.
The praise songs of today are wonderful, but even in the past 10 years or so they have changed so much.  Most just don't last in our hearts the way that hymns do (and I'm a song-writer!).
At BSF, the kids have Hymn Time and the adults sing hymns together in Worship before and after time spent with our discussion groups.
Hymns are a fabulous in helping to build a solid spiritual foundation in our children.

Because of this, we have Hymn Time during our "circle time" every morning.  Each month we will learn a new hymn.  We will work to memorize ALL of the verses because skipping verses skips over so much significance to the song.

This month our Hymn is Holy, Holy, Holy.  The kids sing at least the first verse at BSF, so I figured starting with familiar territory was good.  In teaching them, I am learning myself, and I am cherishing some of the words in this hymn for the first time.

Holy, holy, holy, Lord God Almighty

Early in the morning our song shall rise to Thee
Holy, Holy, Holy, Merciful and Mighty
God in Three Persons, blessed Trinity

Holy, Holy, Holy, all the saints adore Thee

Casting down their golden crowns around the glassy sea
Cherubim and Seraphim, falling down before Thee
Who wert, and art, and evermore shalt be

Holy, Holy, Holy, tho' the darkness hides Thee

Tho' the eye of sinful man Thy glory may not see
Only Thou art holy, there is none beside Thee
Perfect in pow'r, in love, and purity

Holy, Holy, Holy, Lord God Almighty

All Thy works shall praise Thy Name in earth, and sky, and sea
Holy, Holy, Holy, Merciful and Mighty
God in Three Persons, blessed Trinity.

School Rooms and Organized Insanity

This week has been a serious "do it to it" week.  Most of it has been gearing up for starting school this week.

Since we worked through the summer, we're already about halfway through Kindergarten, but I still wanted to get ready to hit the ground running next week (we decided to get serious about school right after Labor Day).  We'll be adding Science, as well as Art and Music appreciation, poetry, and some other little fun stuff.

Bella doing some Math work with place value

...and she built it, said it, and then wrote it...correctly :)

We have (almost) totally rearranged the entire house.  Seems that way anyway.
We put all 3 littles in the same bedroom:

Definitely not "put together" yet, but it'll get there eventually.

 Then we moved the school room to Isaiah's old bedroom, and made our Dining Room an actual Dining Room again:

We have missed having people at our house!  With things set up the way they were, we just didn't really have room to put anybody if we invited them over for a meal.  We have an expandable breakfast table in the kitchen, but expanded it always feels cramped, and when it is not expanded it only sits our family.

Neil and I would want to invite a family over for dinner, and then we'd get really stressed out trying to think about how we could make it work and everybody be able to sit down!  We decided to do what we had to do to get our dining room back.  Isaiah is old enough now that we figured it wouldn't be too hard of a transition to put him in with the older two.  The nice thing about having the school room just down the hall from their bedroom is that the bigger kids can go play in the school room when they wake up, so Isaiah will *hopefully* get a chance to sleep a bit longer.  Balian hasn't quite gotten down how to be quiet when he wakes up, but we're working on it. These things take time.

I'm really liking the school room where it is now.  Even though it's a smaller room, I feel like we have so much more room to work with.  First of all, no piano.  That stayed in the dining room.  Secondly, I can put anything on the walls that I want without sacrificing our "wall-o-pictures".  But really, let's be honest.  My favorite thing about the new school room is the fact that I now have an entire walk-in closet for school storage!!  Amazing!!  So I've been organizing like a mad-woman!  The only down-side is no flooring.  it's concrete.  We tore up the carpet, because well, it was pretty gross, and I don't like carpet in the school room.  And we haven't put anything else down at this point, so we have concrete.  But we washed it really well, so it's really clean concrete :)  I miss the wood floors that we had in the dining room, but oh well.

Here's some pictures of the new school room:

At-a-glace from the hallway door

Other side of the room from the hallway

um, yes.  love this!

The closet is seriously amazing.  Art supplies, Montessori activities for the younger ones, all of the curricula, the books we'll be using for Science, Encyclopedias, etc. fits in there!  And the shoe organizer is the topping on the cake.  Lots of the little stuff found homes here, and I can see it and find it all when I need it.

From the closet

Some of our "Read Aloud" books

More "read-alouds"

The kitchen has a new home in the hallway, just outside of the school room.  I think they use it more now.

Have I mentioned how much I love IKEA?  If I haven't, I will now.

I. Love. IKEA.

This is why:

Kid's table and chairs (and the paper reel): IKEA

Storage Bench and baskets: IKEA

Storage shelf/bookshelf and bins (in closet): IKEA

Oh yeah, and our breakfast table and chairs: you guessed it, IKEA.

Not to mention the best kid's step-stools ever for teaching boys to pee standing up (yes, I just said that).  

But as far as the school room goes, to quote Annie, "I think I'm gonna like it here!"

*This is what happens when I type when I can't sleep.  I get random songs from musicals stuck in my head.  Oh, wait, that's me ALL the time! :)*

So tomorrow the fun begins!

If you're wondering how we are going to do school, along with everything else, here's somewhat of a breakdown:

Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday mornings: basic stuff.  Chores around the house, Circle time (where we do our calendar, along with read-alouds, art and music appreciation, hymn time, poetry, etc.), reading, writing, and Math.

Wednesday mornings: BSF.

We do Bible during lunch, but that may change to dinner-time as more of a family devotional.

Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday afternoons: science/nature study.

Thursday afternoon: gymnastics.

Friday afternoon: grocery shopping.

outdoor play, free play, art, and handi-crafts are interspersed throughout the day.

Nap-time everyday.

Quiet time every weekday.

A girl I graduated High School with summed it up with these words: "Fun Chaos".

I can't wait!!  

Just for fun, here's some pictures of Isaiah finger-painting for the first time using Cool Whip.  Seriously the best thing to use for little ones who still want to eat everything.

Ha.  I love his face in this one.  "What?"

Home School Decisions, Part 3: How?

I'm finally getting back to my Home school series I started forever ago.  I've addressed why we chose to home-school, what method of teaching we like, and now I'm going to get into how we are going to apply all of this and actually teach.

Just like in The Sound of Music, we are going to "start at the very beginning."  It really is " a very good place to start."

The beginning in this sense is subject matter.  What am I going to teach?  A lot, actually, and we're only in Kindergarten!

First, the basics: 

Reading

I am currently going through Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons with both Bella and Balian.  It takes 20 minutes per day, per child.  Bella is half-way through and she's reading paragraphs.  By the end of 100 lessons, she will be reading at a 2nd grade reading level.  Some words that she reads, she never would have been able to read at this point if we were simply teaching phonics.  It really is a fabulous way to teach a child to read.  It takes a lot of the frustration out of the equasion, because it tells you what to say, and it tells you how to correct  mistakes.  Balian is on about lesson 10.  He's reading 3-letter words and he's not quite 3.  Granted, he was already recognizing all of both the upper and lower-case letters, as well as their sounds, which is why I knew he was ready to start reading.  The biggest obstacle with him is the attention span.  I use whatever attention I can get, the most I possibly can.  We usually repeat 1 lesson several times before moving on, so that I know for sure that he's got it down.  Repetition is always good.

After we finish the 100 Lessons, in the back of the book they provide a book list for books to have the child read and what new words they need to learn to be able to read that book.  I'm going to run with that, and go through all of those books with Bella, then move on to something else.  Not sure what yet.  

Writing

Writing is pretty simple...as far as preparation goes.  As far as doing it, it is Bella's least favorite activity. 

 I use a pre-k through 2nd grade writing tablet.  

Her copy- work consists of an excerpt of something she read that day for her "story".

We usually do 1-2 sentences, or about 2 lines.  More than that, and I lose her attention.

She works diligently for 10-15 minutes (I set a timer).  At the end of that time, or when she finishes, whichever comes first, I check her work, we correct any sloppy letters, and we're finished.

Math

I like a hands-on math approach.  I also like a mastery-based approach (mastering one thing before building on that or moving on).  I have a love/hate relationship with Math.  I want our kids to love it.

We chose to use Math-U-See.  We are using the Primer- the very first book, and we're just moving at Bella's pace.  If she grasps a concept really well, then we can fly through it and move on to the next thing.  If she has difficulty with a concept we can continue to practice until she gets it down and I feel like we can move on.

Math-U-See uses manipulatives (aka, blocks) to teach the concepts.  There is a DVD that has each lesson taught in a classroom setting.  It's supposed to be to show parents how to teach their children, but I think it's good for the kids to watch it too.  Then, the parent can make sure that the child understands what was taught, and then the child can practice those concepts.

The other thing that I love about Math-U-See is that it very much emphasizes place value, which will help drastically with understanding math concepts for the duration of their schooling.

http://www.mathusee.com/

Now for the other subject matter.

Science

Science is pretty optional for Kindergarten, but I wanted to teach it.

We are going to be using 106 Days of Creation Studies, available on www.simplycharlottemason.com

The age-range recommended is 1st- 6th grade, but many people use it for Kindergarten.  It combines science with God's Word, as well as giving ideas for activities, field trips, nature studies, living books, etc.  The other advantage is that it can be used for multiple age levels, so it is a subject that can definitely be combined-always a plus! For the older kids, additional reading and activities are Supplemented. I'm sure Balian will be doing everything with us as well.

Bible

Although there is some Bible incorporated into Science as far as biblical basis, I think I may want to do more. I'll just have to see what it's like once we get into it.  If I decide to add more Bible, I'm going to use the Children Desiring God curriculum.  I want to focus on the new and old testament stories, so I'll probably use the pre-K curriculum.  However, I'm a big fan of not spending a ton of money, so I've figured out that if I get the child's book (coloring book), the visuals, and the memory verse cards, I'll be good to go to teach.

Go to www.childrendesiringgod.org for more info.

Art

Along with painting, coloring, decorating, creating, smearing, and the like - we will also be doing Artist Studies.  Essentially, we will learn about a new Artist every 4-6 weeks.  We will learn about the Artists themselves, but we will also be focusing on a different painting by that artist every week.  Example: We study Monet.  We learn all about Monet.  We learn where he lived, when he lived, what made his art special, etc.  then, each week I will put a replica of one of his paintings, in some form or another, in a place where it can be seen all week.  Computer wallpaper, screensavers, books, posters, magazines, calendars, etc. can be used for this.

Oh, but if you want a starting point for art ideas, I have really liked Art with Anything and First Art, both by MaryAnn F. Kohl.  It is pretty basic stuff, but there are a ton of recipes for home-made paint, play dough, and the like, as well as ideas on how to use those broken crayons, etc.  Wonderful!

Music

Much like art appreciation, we will be studying a different composer every 4-6 weeks.  We will listen to a specific work of that composer for a week- in the car, during "art", during quiet time, etc. so that we become familiar with that composer's work.  So if we're studying Beethoven, for a week we might listen to Beethoven's 5th Symphony.  If there are any stories behind specific pieces, we'll learn about that as well.  And when we talk about Beethoven, we will definitely be talking about how amazing it is that he wrote some of the most incredible pieces of music to this day, yet could not hear.

I'm hoping to start teaching some music theory at some point.  Not sure when.  I mean, let's just get used to all of the other stuff first, right?

Another thing I've contemplated is Geography/Social Studies.

For Geography, a curriculum that I find absolutely wonderful is Road Trip USA.  I just don't think I'm going to fit it in this year.  But if you are interested, you can get it at http://www.confessionsofahomeschooler.com/u-s-geography

Up to this point, we've been pretty relaxed as far as school goes.  But being Bella's Kindergarten year - officially starting school for real- we've got to kick it in to gear.  Set a good routine, and stick with it.  It's absolutely possible, but it will take some adjustment - more on Bella's part then mine.  Little Miss Imaginitive doesn't like to stop her playtime...

Add chores, playtime, BSF, gymnastics, a toddler, and a 2-year-old to all of this learning fun, and we have got ourselves a pretty full day, everyday.

That doesn't even include my extras, like grocery shopping, cooking, mending and sewing, praise team, etc.

You probably wouldn't want to see my calendar.  It just might scare you.

Makes me wonder what it will be like when I'm teaching all 3...

I'm going to have to become an incredible time-manager.

To be continued...

The Beauty of the Fog

When I was in college, I was working as a youth director at a church in Louisiana.  Just before getting to the church, I would always drive past a cemetary.  Under normal circumstances there was nothing special about it.  I don't think I even took a second glance.  But on foggy days, as I drove past the rolling hills of the cemetery, the fog dispersed throughout yet seemingly stuck in the lower places in the land, it took my breath away.  There is something beautiful about fog.

Perhaps you think I'm crazy.  What could ever be beautiful about fog?  It's dark, dreary, drizzling, and probably a handful of other words that start with the letter D.  Definitely not beautiful.  More like depressing.

Most of the time when I'm driving on a foggy day, what is in front of me is neither beautiful nor breathtaking.  I just can't see.  It's frustrating.  Why can't the clouds just go away?

But when the fog is in the distance, it doesn't hinder my view.  No squinting.  No straining.  I can see clearly, and I get to see the big picture, the whole picture, the breathtaking picture that is before me.  I may even see a rainbow on the edge of those clouds, in the midst of the drizzle, that I wouldn't be able to see from the middle of the fog.

Because when I'm standing in the middle of the fog, I definitely don't see any rainbows.  Even if they are there, I'm so focused on my circumstance at the moment, on seeing what is ahead, and on simply getting out of the haze, that I miss it entirely.  

Over and over in scripture there are words that help us to see the beauty - the good in the midst of our circumstances.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. (James 1:2-4 NIV84)

Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. (Romans 5:3-5 NIV84)

When my faith is being tested, it's difficult to see the good.  Even if I know these scriptures and have hidden them in my heart.  But it IS good!

Once I can see the big picture, when I am able to look back at a distance, I can see the good.

I've matured.  I've grown stronger in Faith.  I've grown in the knowledge of God's Word, and I've hidden His Word in my heart.  I've experienced God's comfort that can only happen when I am desperate for Him, when I cry out to Him, when I put away my pride and lie prostrate at the foot of the cross.  There is such incredible beauty that comes from desperation.  It awakens a heart's dependency on the Only One on which it can truly depend.  He becomes my refuge, my strength, my mighty fortress.  When I hide under His wings, I realize just how much he loves me, and how much he longs for me to come to Him.  To love Him.

When I have been in that place, leaning on the everlasting arms of God, nothing can shake that.  I know that He will get me through it.

...he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. 

(Philippians 1:6 NIV84)

And I know that whatever comes my way, He'll be right there with me.

For the Lord loves the just and will not forsake his faithful ones.  They will be protected forever... 

(Psalm 37:28 NIV84)

The testing of my faith really does develop perseverance.  And perseverance brings about maturity.  

Because I am able to see a little more clearly now, I see the beauty, and I am thankful for the fog.

God loves me so much that he longs to mature my faith, develop perseverance, and bring me to a place of complete dependence on Him.  Without trials, I can't grow up, I don't mature, and I don't learn to trust Him.  Only when I can do nothing but fall at His feet, do I realize that He really is all that I need.

The trials don't last forever.  It may seem like it, but they don't.

Don't waste your trials on bitterness and selfishness.

Let God do His work to develop perseverance, hope, trust, faith, and maturity.

He is not unloving by allowing trials in our lives.

He would be unloving if He didn't.

3 Cuties

I think this is the only non-bath picture I have gotten of all 3 kids that they all look happy. 

Thanks for taking this, Poppie!

Don't you just want to pinch their cheeks?

The Fog

I feel like my world has been rocked.  And yet, at the same time I feel as though I'm finally finding some clarity.

The past 2.5 years have been such a struggle.  I just haven't been "me".  

I've been trying to see clearly through thick fog.  Squinting.  Straining to see what's in front of me.  Trying to make out the lines that keep me on the right side of the road.  Moving forward slowly, yet feeling like I'm not moving forward at all.

Yet I've been in the Word.  Growing in knowledge.  And drawing closer to the Savior.

I've been on my face before the Lord.  Literally.  Countless times.  Crying out.  Drawing near to the Lord in ways that I never have before - in ways I've never needed to before.

In the midst of my weakness, I have taken my failings to the only One who can transform.

And yet, in my weakness, Satan has used it as an opportunity to plant seeds of doubt in so many ways.

I would read the Word, and see how far I was from where I wanted to be.

I would confess, repent, draw near to God, and yet, I looked and saw the same things present in my life.  The same feelings.  The same actions.

I longed for transformation.

There were times that I would be doing ok for a while.  Good days.  It brought hope that perhaps things were changing.  I would go on-sometimes days, sometimes weeks even - where I felt as though I was truly being transformed.

But I was never truly out of the fog.

I still felt weighed down.  I still felt like something just wasn't right.  I still just wasn't me.

What happened to my fire?

What happened to the life? The spark?  The sense of adventure?

The one who was passionate about life?

The one who loved with everything she had?

I started to question everything.  Where had I gone wrong?

Did I have unconfessed sin in my life?

Was there some unforgiveness?

Why do I feel this way?

I would wonder what I was doing wrong.  What I needed to change.

So then I started going into this works-based mindset.  What can I do?  How can I change?  

Because if I was drawing near to the Lord and I wasn't being transformed, surely I was doing something wrong.

I thought that I had failed.

But a works-based mindset can only lead to behavior modification.  Not true transformation.

I even came to question my Salvation itself, because I still was struggling to see fruit in my life.  I mean, if we know a tree by its fruit (Matthew 7:17-18), and my fruit was bad, then I must not really know the Lord like I say I do, right?

But that would simply bring me back to the quiet place to find refuge and strength.  I would cast my cares on the Lord.  He would renew my hope.

The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save.  He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing. (Zephaniah 3:17 NIV84)

but those who hope in the Lord

will renew their strength.

 (Isaiah 40:31 NIV)

I was doing all the right things.  Going to the right place.  My heart was even in the right place.  So why wasn't I getting better?  It even felt as though I was getting worse.

10 hours of sleep at night, and I was still exhausted.

Mood swings would come out of nowhere...still...when 2.5 years ago I never had a short fuse.

Getting angry over ridiculous things.

Crying at times that seemed just as ridiculous.

Getting really bothered by affection...when I used to be known for my hugs...

Lack of motivation.

I saw all of these symptoms, and many more.

Was it possible that my hormones were still not regulated?  I kept waiting to feel better...but it never happened.

After a conversation with a woman at my church, and prayer, I felt compelled to go back to the doctor.  I started looking up symptoms.  Maybe it was my Thyroid?  Who knows?

But I was willing to, if nothing else, see if there was even a physical problem there.

My doctor tested hormones, thyroid, even vitamins and minerals (B12, Iron, etc.) in my blood to try to find the root of the problem.

A little over a week later I was called with the test results.

Nothing.  Nothing was abnormal.  My blood test came back perfect.

Most people would be ecstatic.  Not me.  I was confused.

I still had a follow-up appointment to go over the test results.  Not really sure why.  But I went.

A doctor- a different one- a woman came in to go over the results with me.  

"this should be easy," she said.  "everything looks perfect."

My respnse: "We did the tests to see what was wrong.  If the tests are all normal, then why do I have all of these symptoms?"

She asked me to go over my symptoms again.  I started crying right there.  Saying "see?  What is wrong with me?"

Then she asked me something really weird.  

"are you craving sugar all the time?"

Yes...totally confused.

Then she started talking to me about Seretonin levels.  That I was showing all of the symptoms of low Seretonin.

Low Seretonin = Depression

It was the first time I had ever heard of Depression as a physical problem rather than an emotional problem.

My Doctor then came in to talk to me about it some more.  He told me that Depression puts this image in people's minds of someone crying in a corner, but that more times than not, Depression shows itself in people who just say that they just don't feel like themselves.  They just don't feel good.

He said that he suspected Depression when he ran the tests, but he wanted to eliminate other possibilities first.

They started talking about medicine, and I got kinda freaked out.

Anti-depressants?  I didn't know how I felt about that.

But the more I talked to my Doctor, the more ok with it I felt.

Could all of the stuff I had been through be summed up to a physical problem of low Seretonin?

I knew I had symptoms of depression.  I never questioned that.  My questions were always about the reason why.

I always had in my head that the Depression was caused because of a deeper problem.  I mean, it showed up right after having Balian, so it had to have started because of hormones, right?  But as time went on and I wasn't getting better, more times than not I just assumed that what I was going through had to be a spiritual problem.  What I hadn't realized was that physical problems can affect my spiritual life, but that doesn't make it a spiritual problem.

Perhaps it wasn't because of a lack of faith that I wasn't healed.

Perhaps it was a physical issue that I was trying to make a spiritual issue.

Now, does that mean that I believe any less in God's healing power?  Absolutely not!

What I am saying is that God heals in different ways.  It isn't always some supernatural healing that can't be explained.

Sometimes He heals in common ways, by going to the doctor, by taking medicine. By receiving treatments.

Does that mean that we don't go to God and ask Him to heal?  Absolutely not!

Because weather by supernatural means, or by wisdom and medicine, it is God that does the healing.

He is "Able to do immeasurably more than we could ever ask or imagine." (Ephesians 3:20)

He is able to heal in ways that can only be explained by the Power of God.

And He is able to heal through medicine, because any wisdom that man possesses came from God in the first place.  Weather man knows it or not.  Weather man acknowledges it or not.

Either way, God deserves the Glory.

And that is what truly matters.  God receiving the Glory.

That is our ultimate purpose here, on earth.  To give God the Glory.

I can't explain why God works in one way with one person and another way with another person, except that perhaps God receives the Glory best in different ways in different people's lives.

Why were Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego saved IN the furnace rather than being saved FROM the furnace? (Daniel 3)

Why did God tell Naaman, throgh Elisha, to go dip into the river 7 times to be healed, even though he expected something different. "I thought that he would surely come out to me and stand and call on the name of the Lord his God, wave his hand over the spot and cure me of my leprosy." (2 Kings 5:11 NIV)

Why did Jesus put mud on a man's eyes to heal his blindness (John 9), and at other times He simply spoke (John 4, and others)?

Why did some get healed by going into the healing pool and others never had the chance to get in there in the first place (John 5)?

God heals in different ways at different times.

God works in different ways, depending on the circumstances.

But His goal is always the same.  For us to draw near to Him, and for Him to receive the Glory.

I haven't been healed yet.  I'm still awaiting my healing.  The fog is still there.  I'm still squinting and looking ahead and wondering if I'm truly moving forward.  But I'm believing that the fog will eventually clear.

I believe that God is able to heal me.

I believe He will heal me, in whatever capacity He chooses.

And just like those 3 men who said "If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and he will deliver us from Your Majesty's hand. But even if he does not..."(Daniel 3:13, 17, 18 NIV).

Even if He doesn't, I will still praise Him.

Because God has already given me Victory through His Son.

I wrote this song a while back.  It's the one that we've recorded for the CD.  Although I don't have the music for you to listen to, I can at least give the words.  

I have treasure in this jar of clay

Overflowing with your goodness, even though I break

Though at times it may seem I'm lost in defeat

I'll remember you've already brought the victory.

You never said that victory meant having things my way

But instead that you conquered all when you overcame the grave

Help me walk in your joy so the world can see

That you've already brought the victory

So I will count it joy when trials come my way

When the world around me crumbles and seems in disarray

I am hard-pressed on every side, but I won't give up

And every strife that this world brings, you have overcome with love

Help me keep my eyes fixed on the cross and through your Word remind me

That you've already brought the victory

So I praise you, Jesus, in the midst of my pain

Knowing battles that I come against will bring you fame

Yes, you are good, and from your throne you can see

And you've already brought the victory

You've already brought the victory.

Blogging Test/What I've Been Doing

Why I haven't been blogging lately...

A dozen diapers down, half a dozen covers to go...