The Christmas Card I Never Sent Out

So....things got a little crazy this month. Between all of us being sick with the "gunk" and my grandfather passing away, I've been a bit pre-occupied. Needless to say, I didn't send out Christmas cards this year. I designed one - just didn't have time to order...so that they got out on time.

So...here's the Christmas card that y'all didn't get. Sorry :(

27 weeks

I can't believe I'm 27 weeks already! Time is flying by so quickly!

I had an appointment with the midwife today, and everything looks good.

* I actually gained about 5 lbs.

* I'm not measuring large anymore...I'm right on track.

* The baby appears to be head-down

Now I start going every 2 weeks for prenatal visits.

I had some discomfort last week because the baby was trying to continue to lie transverse (sideways) but was running out of room! luckily it only lasted for about a day before it decided to change positions :)

And speaking of baby positioning - I checked out a book from the birth center about how to tell what position the baby is in. it's called "The Belly Mapping Workbook: How kicks and wiggles reveal your baby's position" by Gail Tully. I'm excited to get into it.

Now, the biggest thing is getting rid of this stubborn head-cold that I've had for about 3 weeks. I haven't been able to run because of it (running with a cold just makes it worse for me). The midwife suggested I get on some pro-biotics (grapefruit seed extract, etc.) to build up my immune system. Hopefully it works. My go-to stuff (Claritin-D) just isn't cutting it this time. so sad.

15 months

Balian had his 15-month check-up today. Here's the stats:

Height: 31.5 inches (50%)

Weight: 23 lbs. 12 oz. (between 25% & 50%)

Can I just say how much I love my pediatrician? Dr. Simpson is great! I don't feel pressured to get vaccines that scare me right away (she's letting me delay the live ones until he's 2), all the vaccines are preservative free (not just mercury-free; ALL preservatives). She seems totally open to more natural remedies at times... I could go on and on. The more I take my kids to her, the more I like her. Props to my friend Julie for the recommendation :)

The Good:

Balian is doing very well with understanding and following instructions. He's learning where things belong, and wants to help put things away. He wants to help mommy with the laundry, and loves to watch the washer do its thing. He loves closing doors (and opening cabinet doors to get into things). He's doing sign language to say please and thank-you (he has such good manners ;) ). He's doing some animal noises, but mainly animal gestures. He chomps his teeth like an alligator, beats his chest like a gorilla, sticks his tongue out like a giraffe, pants like a dog, attempts to spit like a camel...we've occasionally gotten a "baa baa" for a sheep or a monkey sound here and there. He knows most of his body parts - ears, eyes, hair, tongue, teeth, armpits, fingers, toes, knees. Of course, his favorite is the belly button, and kinda has an obsession with it - but of course, Mommy's belly button is WAY more exciting than his own, and he likes to pull my shirt up and point to it. I'm sure the round belly has something to do with it. ;) He understands so, so much, he just doesn't really have the vocabulary to go with it yet. He does say some things - duck, cat, this, that, book, night night, shoes, socks (LOVES shoes and socks)... but nothing easy like hi (he just waves). He LOVES to play outside, and climb up the big ladder and go down the big slide (on his tummy, feet first) that Neil built (5 ft. high). I just have to catch him at the end.

He also LOVES books. He'll go into his room and just look at books forever! His favorite book to be read right now is "I love you through and through" that he got from Nana and PopPop.

Balian has also made some pretty dramatic improvements with potty training this week. We've long conquered the pooping in the pants (we haven't had a poopy diaper since the last time I posted about it), but he wasn't showing any signs of discomfort with wetness - even with cloth diapers. I couldn't remember when I actually started Bella with training pants (when she was showing any sign that she could be dry...or being dry a lot?), but we decided to try it anyway, and just see what happened. So, we put him in the Gerber training pants with the plastic covers over them (so we didn't get pee all over the house if he wet a lot). Only when he's awake - nap time and bedtime we still use diapers, obviously. Of course, this meant more work for me - the training pants just aren't as absorbent as diapers, so we had to abandon the routine and go full-fledged into potty training. We figured we'd try it for a day and see what happened - and what happened was he did amazing even on that first day! I kept a log of every time we went to the potty - the time - if he was wet or dry - if he told us somehow, etc. The first day, he was dry and went like 8 times. fabulous! so we kept it up the next day...and even with church on Sunday, it was more times that day! Monday, he wasn't feeling well, so I was going to let him "have the day off", but he decided he didn't want to have a day off - he wanted to potty train! He didn't want to wear a diaper - he wanted to wear his "underwear" (training pants) - and that day he started noticing right away when he wet, and started coming to me whining, or patting himself where he wet to let me know. Yesterday, he found me in the kitchen and was whining. I asked him what was wrong, and he took my hand and lead me to the potty. on the way there, I checked and yup, he was wet. He seems to really hate being wet now. yay! Discomfort is the first step...now he just needs to figure out what it feels like BEFORE he goes...so he can tell me rather than just trying to get him to the potty every 20 min. and hope he's dry. I know these things take time..and boys take longer. But my boy is doing so wonderful - especially considering he's been sick! Which leads me to...

The Bad:

Balian has had the sniffles, coughs, etc. this week just like the rest of us. I was glad he had a Dr. appointment today, so that she could check him out just to make sure it wasn't anything else. Well, apparently, he had a slight ear infection in his left ear. so sad. It's the first time he's ever been sick! The boy is so happy all the time, you'd never guess something was wrong other than a cold. Even when his eyes were watering and nose was dripping like crazy, he just played like always, and definitely did not want to neglect any opportunity to play outside :)

The Down-Right Ugly:

Did you know kids could get strep "down there"? I sure didn't. Now I do. And I thought it was just a weird diaper rash or dry skin because of wetting so much at night... apparently not. eek!

What About Christmas?

So I've gotten a lot of questions this year about Christmas and what we do in our family to celebrate. Considering it's our first year to be in Texas and around our new friends, it makes sense. Of course, most don't really expect the answers that I give them...
2 years ago I posted a poem that I wrote about Christmas (you can read my poem here.)
This year, we've been more focused on making other new Christmas traditions. How do we really teach our kids about giving - Giving to the Lord as He gave to us - giving to those in need the things that they need - and that giving is sometimes a sacrifice? How do we replace what we have always known with something new that transforms not only ourselves and our family, but also the world around us?
My friend, Skylar, posted this video on her blog last year that kinda puts things into perspective:

Here's kind of a Q&A, based on the questions I've gotten. It's just meant to explain what we do and why. That doesn't mean we're perfect or we've got it all together - that's totally not the case. We're a work in progress, and we're just trying to do our best.
Do you do Santa? no. We will teach our kids about St. Nicholas - the man that snuck around and put alms in people's shoes and stockings as they were hanging to dry - because they desperately needed the money. He didn't want to take any credit, he just wanted to give as Christ gave. He saw a need, had the means to meet that need, and met it. We want to teach that we give to those who need because that's what Christ wants us to do - not just during Christmas but all year long. How what this man did got turned into what "Santa" is now... I have no clue...
So do you give gifts at all? Our immediate family (Neil, Bella, Balian, and I) don't exchange gifts at all at this point.
why? First off, Neil and I both realized that even though our parents tried their hardest to teach us that Chirstmas was all about Jesus, all we really cared about on Christmas morning was what we were getting. the gifts. not Christ. I know that a lot of people say that we give gifts because the wise men brought Jesus gifts. But to me, that's just the point. They came to give gifts to Jesus - the Christ, the long-expected Messiah - because of who He was. He is worthy of everything we have to give him. But do you notice how nothing was given by the wise men to Mary and Joseph? Although their faith and lives were a pivitol part of the story, they weren't the main event. Jesus was. It seems to me that all of the gifts we give each other just take away from that. What do we really give to Christ on Christmas? Is He really our focus? These are questions that we had to ask ourselves and answer truthfully, without justification...and sadly, our answers were pathetic.
So what do you do instead? We do the Jesse Tree during Advent (see here for info - scroll down to #1), we go to church, we worship together as a family, make a birthday cake for Jesus and sing to him on Christmas day, and we find ways to serve and to give. These traditions are still in the making as well. We're kinda starting from scratch here, so these things take some time. A friend of mine gave me an idea of doing a Christamas scavenger hunt with the kids on Christmas morning that revolves around Scripture. I really like this idea. we may try it out. I also just read about a really neat family tradition: Putting a big box (open and wrapped) by the tree labeled "For the children who have nothing." During the month of December the kids were to carefully think about what toys, etc.they had that they didn't need anymore. They gather them up, clean them up, and put them in the box. Then the toys are given away. You can read more about this and other ideas here.
what about extended family (grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc.)? yeah...we're still in the process of trying to figure all of that out. It's hard to do things differently without making others feel like they have to change things as well. We don't want to interfere with the way others want to celebrate Christmas. We don't want to push what we do onto others. We just want to spend time with friends and family, while also being consistent in what we are teaching our kids and experiencing ourselves. We're trying to figure out the best solution for that, but haven't really come up with it yet.
The hard part is helping others realize that it isn't that we're scrooges. we aren't stingy. It's not that we just don't want to spend money or give gifts. (but seriously - do we really need them?) We love our families and want to give to them because we love them...we just feel like that should happen on a different day. In our family, we do birthdays big, because that is the day we can celebrate that one person. Christmas is Jesus' day. We want to give to Him. Give him the Glory, the Honor, and Praise. But we also want to literally give to him. How do we do that? Look up Matthew 25 (starting in verse 31) "Whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of Mine, you did for Me." Christmas shouldn't be the only time that we give to those in need or serve God's people. But shouldn't we at least give him that on his day?

Diapers

I recently finished a diaper project for a friend of mine (Allie). Now that she's seen them, I can post pictures of what I did :)

It consisted of fitted diapers and covers.

The fitted diapers were made out of VERY good quality prefold diapers - and I used every bit of those prefold diapers! The part that was cut off on the sides was used to make the soaker in the middle (that is sewn in on the top only, so that it washes and dries more efficiently). They snap closed (but no snaps touch baby's tummy), and the tabs can be overlapped for a better fit (sometimes needed when going up to the next size). Elastic around legs and in the back, to keep potential "blow-outs" contained in the diaper. Sewed and surged on the edges for double fraying protection.

The covers consist of one layer of PUL (waterproof) fabric. The binding is done out of the same fabric, so moisture wicking isn't a problem. Some were done with velcro, and some were done with snaps.

Both have an extra layer of fabric behind the front closure part of the cover. So, no snaps rub on baby's tummy, and there is no possibility of leakage due to sewing the velcro onto the cover.

The velcro covers have tabs that can be overlapped for a better fit, and they also have wash tabs to secure the velcro during washes, so that it lasts longer and doesn't get "hooked" onto anything else in the wash :)

The snap covers have 2 full rows of snaps to keep them securely closed, and an extra layer of fabric to secure the snaps and ensure no ripping of the fabric (and therefore no leaking...). I have come to love snaps lately. They don't wear out like velcro does after a while...so you don't have to worry about replacing covers after multiple kiddos have used them (a problem we have run into even the 2nd time around on the size that is used for the longest amount of time.)

Now if I can just get the motivation to do some of this for our stash...

Potty Update

Oh, the potty update.

Good news: Balian has pretty much officially stopped pooping in his diaper. The only time we have a (very rare) messy diaper is if I don't hear him right away when he wakes up in the morning, and I take too long to get him to the potty. Makes sense. He's still young, and can only hold it so long ;) Other than that - during the day, no poop. (I think we've only had 1 messy diaper in the past 2 weeks or so...) Life is fabulous.

Bad news: Balian is definitely not catching on to the potty thing as quickly as Bella did. I suppose it's to be expected. I've always heard that it takes longer for boys than girls. It's just crazy - At this point (14 months) Bella was fully trained during the day, minus naps. She would tell us when she needed to go and everything. Yes, it is definitely different with Balian. I don't think it really phases Balian to be wet at this point. He loves to sit on the potty (he'll sit on there forever!), and when he goes, he gets really excited and claps for himself - he just hasn't developed the understanding of what it feels like BEFORE he goes, and therefore the muscle control yet to be able to hold it until we get to the potty. He knows WHEN he's going. He feels that - and sometimes grunts when he does it. I guess it's just a matter of time and patience.

Not that it really interferes with life too much. We're just sticking to the routine until he shows some signs that he's ready to move forward. We've got the poop thing down, yes....but we need some signs (like, discomfort when he's wet, or showing that he's trying to hold it, etc.) that he's ready to move beyond wet diapers all the time before we transition to anything else but the routine.

Of course, if any of you have trained boys early (less than 18 months), I'd be open to suggestions that worked for you. They're just so different than girls :)

Pecan Harvesting

Our neighborhood is set on an active pecan plantation. Because of this, we have 9 Pecan trees in our yard...and this was our first year to harvest all of those pecans. Luckily, however, we have resources to help us out. Down the street we have a place that rents out harvesters that pick up pecans a LOT faster than we could on our own. They also buy our pecans from us. We were able to take them our pecans - shells on, leaves all in them - and they "cleaned" them, then weighed them - and cut us a check based on that weight. AND what's even better - they shell pecans and sell them right there - so we can take the money that we earned and turn around and buy whatever shelled pecans we want for the year. How much easier could it get?

Anyway, it took us about 2 days of work to harvest all of our pecans - which ended up totaling about 200 lbs. (clean) total! Insane! And we still have some pecans in our yard...and some trees haven't given all of their pecans up yet :) It was a good experience. Bella liked that she could help push the harvester, Balian liked stealing the pecans and playing with them, I liked being outside working and playing together as a family all day, and Neil liked that we got paid to clean up our yard!

23 weeks

This picture was taken at about 20 weeks...oh well. It's the newest one I have.

We had our 2nd ultrasound on Monday. It was odd to not find out what we're going to have, and HARD not to look too! But I'm excited about being surprised. Everything about this birth is going to be so different...and I'm excited about it all.

I love to watch my babies during the ultrasound. They usually have mannerisms that they continue to have after they're born. Bella likes her hands in her mouth...Balian crosses his ankles all the time... This baby was laying it's hand over it's face - so cute...perhaps we'll see he/she sleeping like that once it's out :) The baby also had the hiccups. so cute :)

Everything looked good. due date is right on with the baby's measurements - March 20.

We also had a prenatal appointment with the midwife yesterday. Everything went well. urine looked good, I gained about 2 lbs. in a month, and I'm measuring about 1 week large for the first time ever. ha. One kinda funny thing that happened - the midwife-in-training was having a hard time finding the heart rate...so the midwife came over, felt around on my belly, put her finger where she thought the heart should be, and sure enough, she was right on the money. Ha. makes me laugh every time. She said that my next appointment they'll have me check out a book about baby positioning, so that I can tell exactly what the baby's position is at all times - and what's digging into my side as well ;)

We did check out a video on water birth - just to look at it as an option. Interesting stuff. Didn't seem as messy as I thought it would...and the most interesting thing to me is that none of the babies came out screaming - they were all definitely alert, but as calm as could be. Something to think about.

Running: I've probably averaged running about once per week. Not as much as I would like, but doing anything is better than what I've been able to do before at this point, so I'm excited. Perhaps with it getting colder, the treadmill will get more use and I'll run more often - we'll see. I'm going at about a 12 min. pace for about 3 miles at a time right now. The biggest problem has been my knees hurting, but I think that mainly has to do with going slower and therefore shortening my stride. That always makes my legs hurt. I'm sure more weight putting pressure on joints has something to do with it too, but when I run the pace I really want to (my comfortable pace - faster) my knees don't hurt. I have discovered that the Belly Bands that you can use to help wear pre-pregnancy pants longer is a great belly support for running. It holds the belly in a bit, so there's less bouncing, and that means being overall more comfortable...and less potty breaks too.

Circle Time

We've gotten settled into our homeschool routine for Bella, and every morning we start out doing what we call circle time. It's called various things in preschool. circle time. rug time. carpet time...whatever. we should really call it Hallway time, since we do it in the hallway, but o-well. We start out by doing our days of the week, then talking about today (day of the week, month of the year, date), then we do Bella's bible verses, go over the letter of the week (this week it's the letter I), read our bible story, and maybe even sing a song or two about the season, or what we're learning about. Bella looks forward to it every day. After circle time, we do our "school time" where we paint, write letters, do activities, or whatever...but circle time apparently is her favorite :) Here's some things that she has been learning:
Days of the Week:

Bella's Bible Verses

Counting to 30: this one she's still working on a bit, but she's doing pretty good.

A Step at a Time

Balian, we have learned, likes to progress at his own pace. It's a slower pace than Bella - but whatever. He's been ABLE to stand up on his own for a while now, but he didn't like to do it...it had to be very much encouraged by mom and dad. When he would stand, we would say "come here" but he would just smile, then very slowly squat down and sit on the floor. Yeah. Well, on Sunday, he decided that taking some steps between mom and dad was a pretty fun game. Now, he's finally venturing out and trying to take some steps on his own, without our coaxing.
Here's a not-so-fabulous video of some of his steps. But enjoy!
Oh, and you'll notice that homeboy got a massive haircut. Neil apparently couldn't handle anyone saying "she's so cute" which had happened a couple of times. So, while I was trimming Bella's hair in the kitchen, he decided to take Balian into our bathroom, put him in the bathtub, and take the clippers to his head. When they came out, I almost cried - and I had no pictures of it either! I'm getting used to it now, but I'm still sad to see his curls gone :(

Potty Time!!

We have officially started potty training Balian. The past couple of days we've figured out:

1. He really doesn't like little potties. Most kids are afraid of the "big" potty. Mine doesn't like the little ones. He's 0 for 3 in that department. I even tried one that was specifically made with boys in mind. nope. not gonna happen. But he'll sit on the cushy potty seat that sits on the toilet. Funny kid.

2. Apparently dried cherries are preferred to goldfish as a reward. He loves them! (Neil's idea.)

3. His favorite part of going potty is flushing the potty. He doesn't like to watch the toilet swirl though - he's too focused on the flusher. ha.

So here is what we're doing: We're just adding sitting on the potty as part of our daily routine. Not just once or twice a day, but just like we do the eat, awake, sleep routine when they are babies, we add potty time in there too.

so, when he wakes up, we go potty, and change the diaper.
after breakfast, we go potty, and change the diaper.
at about 10am, he has some water, and about 20 min. later, we go potty and change the diaper.
after lunch...before nap...after nap...after dinner...before bed - all the same deal...when I should really be changing his diaper anyway.

Right now we aren't focused so much on him being dry - just setting a routine - and him getting used to the whole potty thing. So for now, this is what it looks like:

"Ok, Balian, time to go to the potty."
take off the diaper. sit him on the potty. let him flip through his big animal book while he's sitting on there...if he doesn't go after about 5 min, then we take him off - no biggy. If he does go, then we praise him like mad, give him a dried cherry, clean him up, let him flush the potty, then put a new (or dry) diaper on him.
When he hears himself going, or feels it coming out, he gets really excited. Then we praise him, so he's even more excited. Then we give him a cherry and let him flush the potty - and by golly, the potty is the most exciting thing ever!

We officially started yesterday. Yesterday he went about 3 times, and today he went all but one time we put him on the potty (so...about 6 out of the 7 times). pretty neat! I don't think his diaper was ever dry - but like I said, that's not the point for now.

So we'll keep at this for now - just setting a routine - until he shows that he can keep some diapers dry - and we'll go from there.

It worked for Bella, and Balian seems to be catching on beautifully :)

** it's a day later, and before posting this, I wanted to give a fun update. Today (day #3) Balian started really trying to go on the potty every time we put him on there. He would push like he had to poop, even if he didn't - after dinner, I had to let him stay on there a bit longer, because he was trying so hard to go - I wanted to see if something would eventually come out - and hooray, we got some teetee :) He also started clapping for himself as soon as he feels anything come out - he's so excited about it! He also woke up dry from his nap today(his one dry diaper of the day), which is seriously amazing. Must be a fluke. not holding my breath for it to happen again tomorrow, but we'll see. I'm amazed at how well he has progressed just in 3 days! so exciting!

I'll get a potty picture up here eventually...

Questions

It's always amazing to me when everything around me lines up into some central HUGE theme. In college, these "themes" would kick my butt over the course of the year, and usually by the end of the year God had kicked my butt enough that I understood why I was learning what I was, what to do about it, then I was obedient and did it.

Right now, there exists a theme in my life that started January of 09. The church that we were a part of at that time (The Bridge Family Worship Center in Yulee, FL) did a church-wide fast for a week. Neil and I took part and we fasted and prayed for direction for the future. During that time, God showed us that we were supposed to get out of the Navy. Along with that, Neil and I felt like God was calling us out and kicking our butts. He was essentially taking a mirror, putting it in front of us and saying "now you tell me - where have you been living out the command I gave to reach out to the orphans and widows - the poor and destitute - the oppressed people in the world?"
In reality - no matter how hard we could have tried to justify it - there's no way that we could really say that we were doing anything.

We looked at our lives and saw just how ridiculous it all was. Although we didn't feel as though we were living extravagantly by any means, by the American standard...who's standard really matters?
Is our righteousness based on comparison to others? If I say that I don't live nearly as extravagantly as this person over here - who cares? Just because we have a lower mortgage, have 5-year-old cars that both have close to or over 100,000 miles and don't have a car payment, does that really matter in the grand scheme of things?
I'm not half as bad as that person over there, so I must be fine. I don't drink; I don't gamble; I don't swear; I'm not cheating on my husband...the list goes on...I go to church; I sing on the praise team; I help in the nursery; I do this that and everything else....

It all boils down to this: We justify, because we don't measure up when we compare our lives to God's call for righteousness.

I'm not saying that anyone is perfect. We aren't. It's the whole reason we need Jesus. But we have to admit that here, in America, we live very sheltered, excessive, materialistic lives. And because of that - we are sheltered from the reality of the oppression and deprivation that goes on in the rest of the world. Because we don't see it - it doesn't bother us and we don't do a darn thing about it.

And for me - writing a check to "adopt" some kid in Africa doesn't cut it. I'm still cut-off. I'm still so separated from reality. Writing a check is easy because we aren't the ones that have to rely upon God's Providence to provide our next meal. I'm not saying this is bad - we need to do it - I'm just saying that it isn't enough. I have a hard time believing that's what God was talking about when he said to reach out to the orphans and widows. But are we doing anything different at this point? umm.. no.

So Neil and I have been on this very unsettling journey that hasn't really seemed to be going anywhere. We went from living a really comfortable life in Georgia, to living a very comfortable life in Texas. In the meantime, we have shared our struggles with each other over how we just are so unsettled. We feel purposeless. frustrated with the day in and day out of living our pretty cookie-cutter life. There's more to life than the way we are living.

The problem is that we have no vision.
We've struggled with what to do with what we have learned. How do we live this out here, in America? Should we even be in America? Is our culture ripping at our souls?

And people think that us not having cable (and therefore having NO channels to watch - ever) is crazy. I know that there is so much that I hold on to. And these things are totally ridiculous.

Example: We moved into a fixer-upper house (aka - it looks "outdated" because it looks like you stepped into a home in the mid-70's.) Last night Neil and I were discussing finances and wanting to get rid of our house that is currently being rented out in GA - so figuring out how to cut costs to bring the mortgage down to where we could sell the house at a current market value. anyway, we brought up using money we have set aside for home improvements to go toward debt. no problem...I've dealt with carpeted bathrooms for a year...I can handle it for another year... then he mentions how it would mean that we wouldn't be replacing the vertical blinds in our bedroom and Man! did my attitude change or what? "I can't stand those things! I don't know if I can deal with that for another year." seriously. I was throwing a fit and trying to justify how new blinds or curtains were suddenly a need rather than a want - and Neil gently reminded me by using my very own words I had quoted only moments before "It's a matter of needs and wants, Pammy." ugh!

I mentioned BSF in an earlier post (what it is). We're studying the book of Isaiah. Every single week I am utterly amazed at how we are so, so much like Israel was then. The women were haughty and stuck-up parading their wealth around by the clothes that they wore and how fabulously their hair was fixed and how beautiful their jewels were. God told them to change or they would be walking around in sackcloth and would end up bald-headed. He would take away the very thing that they were holding on to for dear life: their beauty and their wealth.
Over and over again God tells the people that they are not looking after the orphan, the widow, and the poor. He despises their religion and unrepentant hearts, and because of this, he would close his ears to their prayers - and would not listen!
He yearns for them to return - to turn back to him - to repent - and to do what he had called them to be - His People.

Over and over again, I feel like I am lost in Israel. Because really - aren't we exactly the same? Who are we trying to impress here? Who's opinion really matters? Who is the One who determines a man's righteousness - because He is the One True example of righteousness.

Oh, how much we need Jesus. And how much I long for a greater vision to do what God has called us to do.
Lord, help me.

17 weeks

ok, seriously...how sad is it that this is my FIRST pregnancy picture of the pregnancy so far? It's horrible. Neil is not one to take any pictures...so I have to rely on creatively figuring out how I can do it myself. So...here's my first shot @17.5 weeks.

Just in the past couple of days I've gotten to that "my belly is tired" stage - when I realize that I've been naturally holding in my belly like I always do, and my abs (and the baby) are starting to resist. My abs get tired, and I finally am forced to relax...and I immediately look a LOT more pregnant. Amazing thing...

Oh, and we've decided to NOT find out what this baby is going to be. We have one of each, and we have everything we need for either one, and our nursery(as well as a lot of the other baby stuff) is gender-neutral, so we're just going to wash the gender-neutral newborn stuff (or both tubs of newborn clothes) and go from there.

of course, I think I know what it is anyway...I always do. And so far, I've been right both times. Bella keeps saying that she's going to be having a baby sister. we'll have to wait and see...

So far, I'm still running, though not as consistent as I would like, and I've had NO problems so far. Not one braxton hicks contraction. I had to stop running @ 16 weeks with Balian, and even earlier with Bella. I'm just going to run as long as I can this time around, just like the other times...only one difference - no bicornuate uterus - and that makes a HUGE difference! I think it would be fabulous to run at least until the beginning of the 3rd trimester (28 weeks). we'll see. I'm not pushing it - seriously. I'm only doing about 2.5-3 miles at a time and averaging about an 11-12 min. pace. Sometimes even slower than that - depepends on the day - how I'm feeling, what my heartrate is like, if I'm pushing both kids in the stroller, etc.

I'm starting to feel the baby move a lot at night. I felt it move once or twice at about 13 weeks, a couple of times at about 16 weeks, but the past couple of days, it's gotten really active. Last night I was carrying Balian, and apparently the baby didn't like Balian's knee digging into my belly, so it was kicking Balian's knee. Almost felt like muscle spasms - and it tickled! ha. Amazing how every pregnancy is different!

Understanding Economics?

I've been listening this week to a radio program by Dr. David Jeremiah about the current economy in America and the world and what it all means...he's written a book called "the Coming Economic Armageddon". The series of sermons for this week have been very educational both about how economics works (explains inflation...helps us grasp how much exactly a trillion dollars is...) and about what God says in His Word about what's going on. Here's a summary:

"Why is the current economic down-turn more troubling than those of the past? What is different this time around? Could it be the trillions of dollars that have evaporated as home values have plummeted? Could it be the premier banking institutions being propped up by government infusions of cash? Dr. Jeremiah examines the causes, effects, and meaning of how corporate greed and fiscal irresponsibility are contributing to the coming fall of the world economy."

you can listen to it on http://www.davidjeremiah.org/site/radio_archives.aspx

The series is titled "The Fall of the American Economy."
just thought I'd share, in case you're interested in having a better understanding.

but of course, I encourage you to use it as a tool to do more research on your own!

Midwife update

So we decided on a midwife to use. It pretty much came down to distance... when considering not just the birth, but every prenatal and postpartum appointment as well...it was a pretty important factor. We've decided to go with the Cleburne Birthing Center and our midwife will be Melody Morrow.

I had my first appointment yesterday morning. Most of the appointment was just like going to an OB - the urine testing, checking the baby's heartbeat, measuring the uterus, asking lots of questions (about past pregnancies, family history, etc.). Some things were very different though.

1. I learned to test my own urine sample. I did the normal thing, but instead of giving it to a nurse to test, I got a strip of litmus paper squares, dipped it in the sample, waited, and compared the colors on the squares to what they were supposed to look like...so I could see if my protein, glucose, and the like were the way they were supposed to be, then reported the results to the midwife.

2. While going over all the paperwork with the midwife, the kids read books, played with toys, played with the assistant midwives, hung out with the other people there, and just had a grand 'ol time. Nobody minded them roaming around and playing. Nobody minded helping me out with them when needed. One of the midwives even let Balian climb the stairs, and stayed right there behind him the whole time while I was finishing up some paperwork and payment stuff.

3. They have free water and snacks for anybody who comes...nutrigrain bars, crackers, etc., and animal crackers for the kids.

4. There's a toy box in every room that appointments happen in. The lobby, the exam room, the sitting area upstairs...the kids always had something to play with to keep them occupied while I took care of my thing. so wonderful!

5. I didn't feel rushed at all. I felt like I every question I had got completely answered, and more. All-over, I felt so incredibly encouraged.

6. I was educated about nutrition like I never have before. Did you know that a pregnant woman needs 90-100g of protein and 3-4 Liters of water (that's 12-16 glasses...or 96-128 OUNCES) EVERY DAY? I was given information sheets about foods that contain protein and iron, and how much they have. I was also given a Food Diary to keep for the next 2 weeks...so that they can see if I'm getting enough water and protein...and an estimation of my caloric intake.

7. I wasn't hounded about doing the down syndrome and cystic fibrosis tests when filling out the consent forms. They referred to them as "not really necessary". And when talking about STD testing (minus the first HIV test required by law), it isn't an automatic thing that they do...they asked if I thought I needed it. I said "nope. that's the beauty of saving sex for marriage." and they just said "sure is!"

8. I was greeted with hugs, as well as got hugs on my way out.

Can you tell I'm excited about using a midwife?

One big thing we have to decide: Home birth or Birthing Center? The reason it's even up for debate (we were already set for doing home birth) is that we found out that our insurance will cover midwife care, if I deliver at the birthing center...but they won't cover a home birth. We didn't think they covered anything, and thought we'd be paying for it all (which really isn't much at all compared to what out-of-pocket expenses are for a hospital birth, even if you're only paying 20%). Apparently that's not the case, and they'll cover the birthing centers...for some reason insurance companies think there's a big difference between a birthing center and home (which there's really not as far as standard of care and resources).
Anyway, still a big decision. But we don't have to decide for sure until 36 weeks...so we have some time to really think it over.

Amazing video - Have you seen this?

I think these videos speak for themselves. Praise God for giving this woman life - so she can speak out for those that are never given the chance. It's kinda long, but well worth watching if you have the time.

Balian's Birthday Bash

We celebrated Balian's birthday last weekend. We had over 30 people at our house...which was pretty crazy. Definitely a full house! So much fun!! Glad I made a lot of food :)

Kiddos playing outside

...and making mud balls...


...and throwing them at each other... this wasn't even the worst. some were totally covered, so we sprayed everybody down with the water hose before going inside :)

Balian in his new chair. He loved his sister's so much we decided to get him his own.

Opening gifts...he liked the tissue paper.

Checkin' out the goods...

The cake. nothing fancy this year...maybe next year.

Now For some Cake: Here, he wasn't sure what to think about everybody singing...

...but he apparently likes the cupcake. I actually had to keep him from putting his hand in the fire! Ha!

Checking out the flavor...

Yes, I think he approves.

What?

Playing with it...

And my favorite...Look how messy I am, Mommy!!

Happy Birthday, Balian!!

I can't believe that it's been a year today since our little boy was born!



In some respects, it feels as if he's been around forever. I can't imagine life without him around. He brings such a joy to our family - and smiles to our faces!
In other respects it feels as if time has taken off right before our eyes!! A year already?

Happy Birthday, my Little Man! I can't wait for the many more ahead that we get to share!

BSF

The kids and I are starting BSF this year, and today was the first day. Not sure what that is? It's Bible Study Fellowship. It's an international, interdenominational, in-depth Bible Study.

International: Everyone who is a part of BSF is studying the very same thing - so someone doing BSF in England or Australia, or some other country...or even someone in California or Maine...we're all studying the same thing.

In-depth: they use a fourfold approach to studying God's Word.
1. Daily questions for personal study
2. Discussion Groups
3. Lectures
4. Printed Notes
so, I'll do my homework to get into God's Word, with just me and my Bible, 6 days of the week. Then, I'll come together with other women and discuss what we learned, then listen to a lecture about how to further apply it, and we are sent home with notes to study even further. They ask for you not to use commentary or other resources until the fourfold approach on a given week has been completed.

This year, the study is on the book of Isaiah. I am totally excited about this! So many times I have tried to read Isaiah and either totally get lost and don't understand a lick of it, or I see tremendous significance, but want to understand it more fully. I'm excited at the possibility of understanding (at least part of) this very important book of the Bible!

I'm even more excited about the fact that my kids are going to be learning right along with me - at their level. I'm excited to see them learn and grow through their time in BSF and also through the devotionals that we do together at home, as their "homework."

But don't think I'm some super-awesome Bible Study queen. I've honestly been pretty inconsistant with getting into my Word since having Balian, really. I've had times of fall-on-my-face desperation with him - I've spoken to Him throughout the day, but I haven't allowed God to speak to ME. And one-way communication is not a relationship. I'm definitely not proud of that fact, and I've been really challenged about it as well. I mean seriously...If I believe that God's Word is real - and I claim to have a relationship with Him - I shouldn't need "motivation" to get into his Word or spend time with him. If I say He's my first priority, then He should be my first thought...and I should be unsettled and have an attitude of anticipation until I spend time alone with Him. So I've been trying to get back into the habit of devotion and finding my Lord in the midst of solitude - which is a lot harder than it seems.

anyway - excited about what's ahead!

Bella's Prayers

Twice this week my daughter has amazed me.

A couple days ago, I was sitting next to Bella at her "little table". I had a headache, and was holding my head in my hands.
Bella said "Mommy, does your head still hurt?"
"Yes," I reply.
"Do you want me to pray for you?" she asks.
"Sure" I say, not knowing what to expect.
she starts praying: "Thank you God for mommy's head. I pray that it wouldn't hurt and that it wouldn't be bad. In Jesus' name, Amen."

...and it felt better about an hour later. no medicine involved.

yesterday, I woke up with my left arm throbbing from my shoulder down to the tips of my fingers. I told Bella that it hurt, and I asked her to pray for me.
"ok, mommy, close your eyes!" she says.
"ok, Bella." And I did.
She prays, "Thank you God for mommy's arm feeling better. I pray that it wouldn't be bad anymore. In the name of Jesus we pray, Amen."

again...about an hour later...it was better without the help of medicine.

What amazes me about the first prayer is that she initiated everything about it. She asked to pray for me, and she did. Sometimes it's difficult to get her to pray before dinner or bed, but by golly, she'll pray when you really need her to!

What amazes me about the second prayer is her words!! She prayed EXPECTING God to make my arm better. "Thank you, God for mommy's arm feeling better..." She was thanking Him for doing something that he hadn't done yet - expecting Him to do what she was asking. That's pretty amazing for a 3-yr. old...especially since I wonder if I have really been much of an example of that...

we may have a prayer warrior in our midst!

Midwives

Last time was home-schooling. Now we're on to home-birthing.... ha.

So I started going to an OB at the beginning of this pregnancy. Got a great recommendation from a friend. Did the lab work, had my first ultrasound...the whole bit. Neil went with me to the ultrasound/appointment, and after the appointment, he was like "She seems like a great doctor, but she just talks so fast, and I just don't think I got any questions answered that I expected to have answered today...I just felt really rushed."
Neil hasn't really been to a lot of OB appointments in the past...and I kinda got used to how they went, and didn't' really have super-high expectations. No biggy. He seemed kinda bothered by it though. He also was like "the hospital she delivers at is 45 minutes away? umm...Pam, I really don't want to deliver a baby on the side of the road. I would have no idea what to do."

so, I told Neil that I would try to get some recommendations for some doctors in town that delivered at the hospital that's only 15 minutes away.
I got some recommendations, and I was planning on calling and making some consultations.

Then, I was talking to a girl at church, who was due to birth baby #2 in just a couple of weeks. She mentioned in the course of that conversation that she was planning on having a home birth. This was only the second time I had met someone who had done a home birth (the last one being a week before having Balian), but for some reason this time it just kinda caught me off-guard and really made me think...

I have never even considered planning a home birth. I always said "oh, I could NEVER have a home birth...way too scary."
But somehow, I found myself waking up that night, thinking about the possibility of that very thing.

Neil was in Korea at the time for his reserves 2-week training/deployment and he called me the next night. I just mentioned to him the conversation I had with the lady at church, and at the word home birth, he immediately said "YES! I want to know everything there is to know about having a home birth." I was totally in shock. apparently Neil had been thinking about home birth for a while, but was just waiting until I warmed up to the idea. ha! never would have guessed that one!

So...I started my research. Being the research-loving person that I am...I did a LOT of research! And I'm still researching!
It's amazing how much information you can find on this stuff. There's been documentaries done "The Business of Being Born" and "Orgasmic Birth" (which they probably just titled that way to get people to watch it...) and there's all kinds of research that has been done about how our country compares to other developed nations as far as c-section rates, infant and maternal mortality rates, and how that all has to do with OBs and hospitals vs. midwives and non-hospital births (birthing centers and home births). The more I read about the model of midwifery care, the more comfortable I felt with the idea...and not only that, but I also started to really LIKE the idea...and started getting excited about it. what?
I called two different midwives to set up consultations. That in itself was amazing. The midwives themselves answered the phone, set up the consultations, asked me some questions, and asked if I had any questions. I was probably on the phone with each midwife for anywhere from 15-20 minutes...and all of my questions at that point (do I even qualify for a home birth? what about precipitous labor? what about GBS? do you do stitches? how do you handle the possibility of hemorrhaging?, etc.) were totally answered by the time I was off the phone. Not only that, but each midwife explained that they would take me on a tour of the birthing center, and afterward we would have question and answer time to get to know each other better...and that this would probably take about an hour or so.
seriously? you're going to take an hour to answer all of my questions and show me how you're going to take care of me? You mean I'm not going to be waiting for an hour, and then getting about 5 minutes with you where I feel rushed and unsure about if I have any questions?

well, after my two consultation appointments with two different midwives, Neil and I are SOLD with the amazing level of individual care - and of course, the more wholistic approach to pregnancy and childbirth in general.
What? I don't have to be strapped to a bed with IVs and monitors? I can move around as much as I want, get in the bathtub if I want, have a water-birth if I so desire, eat and drink during labor, and have a home-cooked meal and an herbal bath with my baby after it's all said and done? I can breastfeed ASAP and have breastfeeding support at my fingertips as well as more post-partum care that includes baby care as well? (2 days, 2 weeks, 6 weeks, more in there if needed...some even do up to 12 weeks).
Anyway, we're super-excited. Now, we just have to decide WHO to use. And considering how great both options are, it may be a pretty difficult decision. we'll see!

Homeschool??

We've talked about it. we've thought of alternatives. we've shared concerns. Now it's time to take action.

Our homeschooling talks started before we were even married. We lived up in Saratoga Springs (Neil) and Ballston Spa (Pam), NY for 6 months during some of Neil's training for the Navy (Prototype). We were fortunate enough to find an incredible church family, and oddly enough, that church family was loaded with homeschooling families... 1 family had 3 kids, and 2 other families had 5 kids.
However, none of these kids fit the "home schooled kid" profile that I had always been told about, and seen. You know, the kid that has absolutely no social skills, and is more excited about picking his nose than interacting with people...the outcast kid at church...and the one who just doesn't seem to "get it?"
These kids weren't like that at all! They were polite, courteous, interactive with both adults and other children of ALL ages - their own peer group, older, and younger. They had an incredible understanding about the realities of life, and the realities about who God is. Other kids liked them! The only thing they were lacking was the irresponsibility, obscenity, and perverseness that is so common these days with kids of ALL ages.
I remember Neil and I looking at each other and saying "Those kids are home schooled?"

As time went on, we met more and more people that had gone through some kind of home school curriculum, and were just as social, if not more so, than people who were not. And they were incredibly intelligent.

Bella has always been bright. I've never really had a plan with her, other than to just challenge her as she's ready for it. That was my potty-training technique, and that's how I've been with her with everything else as well. When she was 10 months old, we were looking at an animal book together, and, as always, I was going over the same animals and the same sounds that we always did, only this time she pointed to the dog and started panting (a sound she could make at that age). From there, we did all kinds of animal sounds, and just kept going...shapes, colors, letters, etc. Whenever she learned one thing, I'd make it a bit more difficult to challenge her. Always repeating everything over and over and over again...

Anyway, there came a point about a year ago that I started thinking about school for her. I started school when I was 2 ( a mother's day out sort of thing), so it wasn't weird to me to think about it. With Balian coming, I thought it might be good. Then I started thinking...
Bella does so well working at her own pace. She's really bright. She learns so quickly. I started worrying about her being bored, and then hating school. Then again, there was the social aspect of it...I feel like for the past year, I've been torn.

Once we moved here, to Granbury, and I was dealing with so many things at once (moving, newborn, PPD, making friends, starting out at a new church) Bella's behavior started to become pretty bad. I know a lot of it was all the changes that she went through. Not just the moving, but mommy being different. We were at home A LOT more than we were before Balian was born...(I still don't think we're really back to our "out and about-ness" that we had before. ) I think a lot of her misbehavior has had to do with down-right boredom. And I, after taking a long break from all the challenging and teaching with Bella, didn't really know where to start as far as how to give some structure to our days and teach her at her level. I would try to teach her something, but I'd get frustrated when she didn't "get it". I was teaching over her head. I was totally lost. and frustrated. I think I just kinda gave up.

For months, we've been butting heads, and I've been like "There's no way I can home school this girl - I'll go crazy! Can we just put her in school this year?"

Then the light turned on. I need help!
A friend of mine told me about a curriculum that she had been looking at called Hands on Homeschooling. Essentially, the mom who made it was a former preschool teacher that decided that she needed to add some structure to days at home with her first child, who was 2 at the time.
Seriously, this may be the best breath of fresh air I've seen in a while! The curriculum is not only bible-based, it's like school and Sunday school combined in a really practical, FUN package, that only takes up about an hour a day for "teaching". Recipes, activities, field trips, Bible stories and memory verses for every week, worksheets (like for tracing letters and numbers) etc. are all put together in a nice, neat little package. Oh, and the best thing about it is that preschool isn't this one big chunk called 2-5 years. Each age has a totally separate curriculum. So the 3-yr. old curriculum is very specifically age/developmentally- based for 3 yr.-olds.
I think this is fabulous.
Where do I sign up?
Well, now I know where. I just have to do it.
My only dilemma is that we don't have an extra room to set aside for school. I know that isn't necessary, but it seems like it would help with focus. We'll figure it all out in time...

If any of you home school and you have some suggestions/ resources, PLEASE let me know! I'm new at this, and I'm learning as I go...heck, I haven't even started yet! And by-golly, I need help!

Balian's 1-yr. pics

I can't believe Balian is going to be ONE in less than a month! I took his 1-yr. pics early, to do invitations, of course! We had a lot of fun being really messy! Somehow I was able to get at least SOME good shots - even with a cranky, teething baby! Enjoy!

Some News Bites

I wish I were giving an update on my post from a couple weeks ago (oh, the possibilities...), but nothing has really come of it yet. So yeah...still not gonna clue anyone in on that one yet.
However, we've got some other news bites that I wanted to share:

1. Balian has been cutting teeth like crazy. He cut both of his bottom middle teeth within a week. Now, on week 2, he's working on his first top tooth. He's also cruising around furniture like crazy, and accidentally letting go for a couple of milliseconds...only until he realizes that he's not holding on to something and immediately does so. Not sure when this boy is going to start walking. Probably a week and a half after his first birthday, just like Bella...he's followed her footsteps on everything else! Totally has the strength already...just not the guts. He's so careful for a boy.

2. Neil is off on his 2-week deployment that he has to do once/ year for the Navy Reserves. we don't think the boat he's on is actually going to go out at all, which is nice, but he's still on the other side of the world, so it still seems like it. But two weeks vs. 2-4 months is NOTHING in comparison!

3. Bella has learned all of her uppercase and lowercase letters. we've been working on her letter sounds for a while now, and she knows all of them except for the vowels. She can get the short sounds, but the whole "letter saying it's name" thing just totally goes over her head apparently... and if she does get it for a bit, then she thinks that EVERY letter says it's name...I can see how it would be confusing. Any suggestions on how to help her out would be greatly appreciated. I've tried making up silly poems to help her out and everything. anyway, as soon as she learns ALL of her letter sounds, I'm taking her to the "beach". Our beach is Granbury City Beach, which is amazingly a pretty nice beach/park on Lake Granbury - with good sand, and water with only "lake waves". Perfect fit for Bella!

4. I'm slowly learning to drive Neil's car...it's a standard. So far, I've only driven it once out of our neighborhood, but our neighborhood is pretty huge. Now I'm working on driving it to church on Sunday mornings...less traffic. once I master that, I'll probably branch out and do more :)

5. We're pregnant again.

Did that catch you off guard? yes, it did us too - shockingly, actually. I think I'm still in shock and I've known for about 5 weeks now.

To answer some questions that I know you're wondering:

- why so shocking? I was on BC for 3 months to help regulate hormones because of the PPD. I was feeling good, so we decided to do a trial and get off of it and see if I still felt good. I had absolutely NO fertility signs, and we still got pregnant. only us, right? Oh, and then the funny part is that at about the time I was supposed to start, my temp dropped just like it should...SIKE! (yes, I just typed that). It totally shot up again after that...and on day 17 of high temps, I was like "wow. I'm pregnant." so no fertility signs, then no symptoms of pregnancy at all like I usually have early on...nothing. but sure enough...we got two lines. Just goes to show that God is totally in control. He does what he wills, whether its in our plans or not. He Blesses us when we least expect it.

- I'm 9 weeks pregnant.

- I'm due March 20

- Balian and the baby will have an age difference of 18 months.

- Boy or girl doesn't really matter to me, but I already think it's a girl. I could totally be wrong though.

- This pregnancy has been the worst so far with how I feel. I'm so much more nauseated...but the worst part is that like always with me...I never actually get sick. So I just feel horrible all the time with no real relief except for sleep. I feel bad when I'm hungry...or when I just ate. I feel bad because of the heat...or because I'm in a moving car...or because I just do for no reason at all... and it's all like this heartburn-ish yet dizzy kind of nausea. horrible. Luckily, my dad had these Sea Bands that he uses for motion sickness that are also supposed to work with morning sickness...and it totally helps! They're like sweatbands that you wear on your wrists that have this bead on them that you put over a certain pressure point on the wrist. Totally great!

- I've had my first Dr.'s appointment and my first ultrasound.

- I NO LONGER have a BICORNUATE UTERUS!!! Praise the LORD!! Apparently Balian stretched it out, and I'm normal now!

- I may end up changing doctors because of proximity to the hospital. The doc I'm currently going to now doesn't deliver in town - she delivers in Ft. Worth at Harris Methodist SW, which is an AMAZING hospital - especially for labor and delivery...but problem is that it's 45 min. away. If it worked out like the last two kids, and I was at the hospital already before going into labor, that would be great, but we just don't know that. The hospital here, in town is only 15 minutes away. I'm going to try to go on a tour of the maternity ward, and set up a consultation with a doc that was recommended to me that delivers in town.

- we will be looking into getting a minivan (yes...those words just came out...can't believe it. never say never, I suppose.)

- lets just say that we've been totally spoiled by the Navy when it comes to maternity care. :)

I guess that's all for now!

House Update

We've been working hard on the house lately, and things are finally starting to come around.

In the Livingroom, our bedroom, the entry-way, and the kitchen:

we tore off the edges of the wallpapered walls (noteverything would come off...as we learned the heard way in the livingroom...so we just pulled up the edges that were curling up) and sanded them down. Neil then went over the edges with Joint Compound (Bella's new favorite word) and we sanded again. Then, we primed the walls, had a friend come help us texture the walls to match the rest of the house, primed the walls again, and now we're working on painting them.

Whew! That's a lot of work.

The good news: once we finish painting the walls, we'll be able to pull up the rest of the carpet and put down new flooring!!!!

We have been going back and forth between hardwood and laminate - weighing the difference between raising the resale value of the house and just dealing with scratches (looking at them as adding character) as they come with hardwood, or not raising the resale value as much and at the same time not having to worry about the flooring with kids running around with laminate.

We opted for the latter. We loved having laminate in GA - so easy to clean and so durable. We found one that I think is really pretty too :) So, we've got the flooring picked out (for the dining room, entry, livingroom, hallway, and our bedroom)...now it's just a matter of putting it in. It'll probably be about another month or so before Neil is able to get it done, but I'm still super-excited!

Here's our sample of the flooring we want:

Oh! And I totally haven't shared the project that I did a while back!

I got this old contractor chandalier from the Habitat for Humanity ReStore in Clebourne (about 30 min. away). I used spray paint to prime it and paint it a metalic bronze color, and we hung it in our dining room. Isn't it pretty??

Before:

After:

The Mom Song

So I was listening to the radio today, and they played this song, and I thought it was fabulous. Thought I'd share :)

Go Fish - The Mom Song
- Watch more Sports Videos at Vodpod.

Oh, the possibilities...

There may be something pretty exciting brewing in the future for this Jones family. However, I'm not going to state what's going on until I have confirmation that it isn't just some crazy idea or dream... when there is some kind of concrete info to share.
No babies that I'm aware of, so don't go guessing on that road...
I know. I'm a horrible tease.

I will only say that an amazing opportunity seems to be opening up for me. I'm challenged by the possibilities - but excited all the same. Could you pray for me? That the doors would either continue to blow wide open, or that they would be slammed shut - For God's will to prevail - for courage - for creativity - for peace - for wisdom - for continued humility and awe.

Thanks so much!

Watermelon

We spent July 4th weekend with Neil's family in Louisiana. Too bad I totally slacked off on packing the camera...grr... So this is the best I got with my camera phone. But totally great! This boy loves his watermelon just as much as his Daddy and sister do! :)

Stainless Steel, Here we come!

I just ordered some stainless steel cups for the kids! I'm way excited!

For Balian, we have the Organickidz stainless steel bottles. They come in 4, 7, and 9 oz., and they have both narrow and wide bottles. We are getting the 9 oz. wide bottles, however, we're going to use it as a sippy. (you can use all of the Avent sippy spouts with it or Thinkbaby sippy spouts as well)...and later on as a sport cup. http://www.organickidz.ca/ But we got ours from Babies R Us - one stop shopping for bottles, sippy spouts, trainer handles, etc. (and a bit of a price break)

For Bella, we have the Klean Kanteen - 12 oz, has all kinds of different top options, including a sippy cup (using the Avent sippy spout...which means you COULD use it with the Avent bottle nipples too...but 12 oz. seems a bit large for that...). Later on, when the sport top comes out with the organickidz stuff, we'll get those and Bella and Balian can share. The Klean Kanteen comes in lots of different fun, happy colors too! http://www.kleankanteen.com/

What I'm Reading Now

Boys Adrift: The five factors driving the growing epidemic of unmotivated boys and underachieving young men

by Leonard Sax, M.D., Ph.D.

As soon as my college mentor found out that we had a little boy, she suggested to Neil that he and I read this book. It took us a while to get it - and I wish we'd read it sooner!

This book is about why we see so many boys and young men failing in school and disengaged at home - as well as why so many boys are being diagnosed (many misdiagnosed) and treated for ADHD - and how these boys are being affected by the medications that "seem" to be working.

The five factors that he talks about are:

Video Games

Teaching Methods

Prescription Drugs

Environmental Toxins

and the Devaluation of Masculinity

A fact about me: I'm a pretty research-loving person. I actually loved my Family research meathods class in college, believe it or not.

I have seriously been FLOORED reading this book. In particular, the chapter about Environmental Toxins, referring to Endocrine Disruptors, was seriously disturbing. I've done research on BPA - and BPA is all the public has really been warned about - but the "experts" still won't admit how big of a problem it is. After reading the stuff on BPA, I got rid of all the plastics in my house that were not BPA free. Well, as it turns out, that just wasn't good enough. Apparently BPA is just one of the many Endocrine disruptors that are found in plastics. And these are just as bad, if not much, much worse than BPA. And all the stuff that we've read about only having to worry about BPA and the like when food is heated, doesn't matter anymore. It isn't just heat that makes this stuff leach onto food. Yes, it makes the leachig worse, but some of this stuff can leach onto food or drinks by just being in the plastic in general.

When male fish exposed to this stuff end up not having sperm, but rather producing eggs - and tons of men in the same area where these fish were found are having a plethera of fertility problems....and when girls exposed to this stuff shift the "norm" of the onset of puberty to the age of 8 - yeah. it's time to take this stuff seriously.

After Neil read this chapter, he had me stop using plastic anything to warm Balian's food - even if it was BPA free. We now use glass bowls for all of his food.

After I read this chapter, I'm ready to throw out every bit of plastic I can in the kitchen. Tupperware, sippy cups, pitchers, bowls, plates, everything. I'm looking into stainless steel sippy cups and sport cups, stainless steel bowls, plates, and regular cups for the kids, and pyrex glass storage containers for the tupperware.

Yes. I'm absolutely serious.

I know that plastic is everywhere - so much food is sold in plastic. we just can't get away from it, unless we are able to shop at whole foods, where much of their food is sold in non-plastic packaging. But the way I see it, the more I CAN do, the more I help my kids.

The chapter on ADHD tied everything together for me too. I've always been skeptical of the big "ADHD push" that has been going on lately. It's like every time you turn around somebody is diagnosed with ADHD. Yes, I know, and the author definitely points out that there ARE real cases of ADHD (some of which is caused by some factors of the endocrine disrupters, believe it or not), but that there are also a TON of boys especially that are being misdiagnosed, and the effects of putting these boys on medications are not pretty.

This book is all based on research, (not just by the author, but by many others as well) and clinical experience.

So, a scary book, yes. But whoever said "Ignorance is bliss" is decieving themselves - and everyone else too. Ignorance is not bliss. Ignorance just may mean a gradual change over time that results in a society of imasculated males that have no drive for life or anything else for that matter. And that's just not what God intended Men to be.