Showing posts with label Motherhood. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Motherhood. Show all posts
Monday, September 24, 2012
Love This!
I love cheesy videos about parenting :)
This one even made Neil laugh by just listening to it from across the room.
Fabulous!
Wednesday, June 27, 2012
Homeschool Decisions, Part 2: What? The Madness Behind My Educational Philosophies
So now we ge to the part where we talk about what I will be teaching my children. Of course, that question is heavily based on my homeschool philosophy, so let me start off with a bit of information about the different homeschool "schools of thought".
Traditional
A traditional homeschool approach is based heavily on the use of textbooks and workbooks. It looks very much like what you would find in a typical school setting, only it is taught at home. The curriculum is age/grade based, meaning, what the child studies in a given year is based on what is thought to be academically appropriate for their age. They complete a lesson, take a test, and are graded based upon their performance, then they move on to the next lesson.
Content-based
Content based curricula are most often seen in the forms of the Classical approach, and unit studies. The Classical approach has very specific content that the child is to master. For example, in the first 4 years of the classical "trivium" there is much focus on the child memorizing all kinds of information and facts. Then, as they progress into the next level, they build on those facts and ask "why" when a child is naturally inclined to ask why anyway. Then, in the last level of the trivium, the child is in the rhetoric stage, building even more on what they have learned.
In unit studies, each lesson is content-specific, but all subjects tend to go together. All of the subjects are based on the same topic. For example, if in science, they are studying about the human body, then math will be based on something to do with the human body, as well as the reading assignments,etc.
Child-centered
Child centered schooling are methods that range from unschooling to Montessori. Child-centered models focus on letting the child direct their learning path, and letting adults get out of the way of their learning. Montessori is set up to where the child can self-correct mistakes, without need of intervention, unless asked.
Unschooling is essentially studying about whatever the child is interested in. If a child shows an interest in dinosaurs, then you get your hands on all things dinosaur- books,museums,etc. you take advantage of this learning opportunity and run with it.
Home-centered
Home centered methods are centered around the home. Everything in the home- the environment, the activities, the resources, are all home-centered and are all a part of the learning process. (home, meaning family) Academics are not necessarily separated from the rest of life, and life experiences are very much valued in the learning process. The most common home-centered method is the Charlotte Mason method. Education is taught mostly through the use of "living books".
I probably did a horrible job on these descriptions, but I'm trying to put them in my own words, and what I understand about them.*(see note below for more on these approaches). At some point or another I have looked into every one of these approaches, or a combination of them. Some stuff that we've done at home has been very Montessori minded. We've also gone the workbook route. I looked a lot into the classical approach.
The nice thing about homeschool nowadays is that there isn't this one size fits all approach. We have options! We don't have to do things the way that a school does them...because you aren't in a school! That gives me so much freedom. The hard part is breaking out of the box of what we have always been taught, or the way that we were taught. We don't even have to stick to one specific approach -we have the freedom to mix it up a bit-to use a little bit of traditional, mixed with some Montessori, and some unit studies. That's the beauty of it all. You have the freedom to teach your kids in the way that you want to/are led to teach them, and that could look completely different from one family to the next, or even one child to the next. But isn't it amazing that we, as parents have the opportunity to give each of our children the best possible education, that is the best possible fit for them? How else do we have that opportunity, but by teaching our children ourselves?
I'm honestly not exactly sure how this year is going to look. After taking a good look at my kids, and Bella especially, and how they learn...then taking a look at our goals for their education, and our own personalities, we've decided to go the home-centered route. And, honestly, It's pretty much the way I do things naturally anyway. I've always been one to teach my kids no matter where we were.
At the grocery store we can count, pick out shapes, name colors, read labels, etc.
Outside, we like to play, but sometimes we run into a very teachable moment (like observing eggs in a bird nest), or gardening with mommy,or working out in the garage with daddy.
Chores, cooking, art, everything is a learning opportunity. When I've gotten away from this, I've gotten stressed out. When I try to go by the books, my kids either get bored or they get frustrated. We all do much better when I simply challenge them where they are, and once they've mastered something, I challenge them more.
Do you see how this all fits in with discipleship?
Whether its Charlotte Mason or Whole-Hearted Learning, it's all based on the premis that my child is a living, learning, spiritual being, not just a tank for filling with information. It's opening up the child to a world of learning. My goal is to help my children to continue to love learning as much as they do now. I want them to become avid learners. I really believe that's what God desires for all of us in education. To become good learners, so that we can be teachable, and so that we are continuous students of His Word.
There is so much that goes into home-centered learning, apart from academics. Teaching the arts. Music, artists, etc. Character training. The study of God's Word. Going on nature walks and studying God's Creation. Life skills training.
This is why I believe that discipleship is the foundation for education. Discipleship and education happen together, at the same time. When we disciple, we educate. When we educate, we disciple (whether intentionally or not).
So much of this is stuff that most homeschooling families do throughout the day anyway, but they may not be super-intentional, or may not have the perception that all of these things add up to education, rather than being entirely separate entities.
Don't take me the wrong way. Academics are important too; however, I'm more interested in if my child is really learning, than what academic level is printed on the front of their books. I would rather Bella really learn something, and have it stick, then just simply learn something for a test, and then forget it entirely. I don't just want her learning fact after fact after fact. I want her to live it and breathe it.
Kind of like with Jesus...
I want her to touch the difference between a frog and a toad, not just read that a frog has slimy skin, and a toad has rough,dry skin. And if we can't touch a frog or a toad, then I want her to read about them in a way that captures her imagination, rather than just spit out facts and answers.
I want Bella, Balian, and Isaiah to love God. I don't just want them to know facts about Him, or have a million different Bible verses memorized by the time they graduate High School. I want them to know Him personally; to experience His presence; to stand in awe of His Majesty. I want them to know that they know that they know - not just because they have it memorized, but because they have learned to live it out in every area of their lives.
Obviously, there's only so much I can do in this area. I can't MAKE them love God. Even God himself can't do that. I can't bring them to a place of salvation - that is accomplished only by the work of the Holy Spirit in their hearts. But I can show them by how I live that I love God - and I can teach them about my Savior by getting into His Word with them. I can teach them how to worship by being a worshiper. I can teach them how to pray by being an example of prayer. And hopefully, by seeing my love for the Lord, they will desire to love the Lord as well. Until then, I will be standing on faith, and kneeling in prayer for the Holy Spirit to do a work in their hearts - to bring them into a place of repentance, salvation, and that they would have hearts that are set on fire for God.
Bella is a free spirit, and Balian is a kid that is so full of energy, I can barely keep up with him. Both of them are so full of life! And God made them that way! To make them learn in the traditional sense, would, I believe, squeeze the beauty out of the way God created them. I want to teach them in a way that causes their personalities that God gave them to shine - and to develop into what He wants them to be.
Yes, there are subjects that require more structure, like math, reading, and writing. With these I have learned that short lessons are the best way to hold their attention.
Math: 15 minutes.
Reading: 15-20 minutes.
Writing: 10 minutes.
What I have seen is that they learn to focus for that small amount of time to where that time spent is more productive than an hour of struggling...where no learning happens. They remember when they pay attention. Things stick better, and they master things more easily. I am at a place where I just have to say "no thank-you" to pulling teeth to get a child to read and write. That in no way instills a love of learning. Instead, it causes a child to think that learning is boring, tedious, and altogether a negative experience.
However, that's not to say that we shouldn't train children in diligence. Sometimes even a 10 minute lesson in copy work(writing) takes a reminder to do our best work without dawdling or wasting time. But diligence is much more easily taught in a 10 minute lesson than a longer lesson that becomes a burden to finish. As time goes on these lessons will increase in duration as each child is able to pay attention for longer periods of time.
So what we are doing is basing our learning not on how much we get done in a lesson (thinking that we must complete a certain amount of pages per day, etc.), but how completely a child understands, as well as the quality of work that is finished. It's mastery-based learning at its finest. They will not move on to the next thing until I know for sure that they grasp a concept fully. They "master" one thing before moving on to the next thing. The beauty of this is two-fold. If they need more work in one area, then you have the freedom to stay there for a while until they really get it. The other advantage is that if the child grasps the concept quickly, you don't have to stay on that concept and bore the child to death. You can move on when they are ready. So each child is able to work at their own pace. More challenging for quick learners, and less frustrating for slower learners.
So how do we fit it all in? Math, reading, writing, art, music, bible,science, and history, as well as so many other things like running a household...and how in the world do you do it with 3 children who aren't even all doing "school" yet?
I mean, I still have to feed them, for goodness sake!
What does it really look like in a tangible way?
What are we actually using for curriculum?
I'll answer those questions next time, as well as give a lot of useful resources, so keep your eye out for Homeschool Decisions, Part 3: How?
* For more information on the different homeschool approaches, go to the Simply Charlotte Mason website.
They do a good job with giving unbiased (more detailed) information about each approach, as well as some places to get more information about other approaches as well.
Or get your hands on Educating the Whole-hearted Child by Clay and Sally Clarkson. They do an excellent job of describing, in detail, the differences between ALL of the homeschool approaches. An excellent resource for beginning home-schoolers! (I talk about the book in this post, if you want to read that as well.)
Traditional
A traditional homeschool approach is based heavily on the use of textbooks and workbooks. It looks very much like what you would find in a typical school setting, only it is taught at home. The curriculum is age/grade based, meaning, what the child studies in a given year is based on what is thought to be academically appropriate for their age. They complete a lesson, take a test, and are graded based upon their performance, then they move on to the next lesson.
Content-based
Content based curricula are most often seen in the forms of the Classical approach, and unit studies. The Classical approach has very specific content that the child is to master. For example, in the first 4 years of the classical "trivium" there is much focus on the child memorizing all kinds of information and facts. Then, as they progress into the next level, they build on those facts and ask "why" when a child is naturally inclined to ask why anyway. Then, in the last level of the trivium, the child is in the rhetoric stage, building even more on what they have learned.
In unit studies, each lesson is content-specific, but all subjects tend to go together. All of the subjects are based on the same topic. For example, if in science, they are studying about the human body, then math will be based on something to do with the human body, as well as the reading assignments,etc.
Child-centered
Child centered schooling are methods that range from unschooling to Montessori. Child-centered models focus on letting the child direct their learning path, and letting adults get out of the way of their learning. Montessori is set up to where the child can self-correct mistakes, without need of intervention, unless asked.
Unschooling is essentially studying about whatever the child is interested in. If a child shows an interest in dinosaurs, then you get your hands on all things dinosaur- books,museums,etc. you take advantage of this learning opportunity and run with it.
Home-centered
Home centered methods are centered around the home. Everything in the home- the environment, the activities, the resources, are all home-centered and are all a part of the learning process. (home, meaning family) Academics are not necessarily separated from the rest of life, and life experiences are very much valued in the learning process. The most common home-centered method is the Charlotte Mason method. Education is taught mostly through the use of "living books".
I probably did a horrible job on these descriptions, but I'm trying to put them in my own words, and what I understand about them.*(see note below for more on these approaches). At some point or another I have looked into every one of these approaches, or a combination of them. Some stuff that we've done at home has been very Montessori minded. We've also gone the workbook route. I looked a lot into the classical approach.
 |
| Yes, an iPad or iPhone can be a learning tool. Balian is tracing letters and numbers with a stylus. |
The nice thing about homeschool nowadays is that there isn't this one size fits all approach. We have options! We don't have to do things the way that a school does them...because you aren't in a school! That gives me so much freedom. The hard part is breaking out of the box of what we have always been taught, or the way that we were taught. We don't even have to stick to one specific approach -we have the freedom to mix it up a bit-to use a little bit of traditional, mixed with some Montessori, and some unit studies. That's the beauty of it all. You have the freedom to teach your kids in the way that you want to/are led to teach them, and that could look completely different from one family to the next, or even one child to the next. But isn't it amazing that we, as parents have the opportunity to give each of our children the best possible education, that is the best possible fit for them? How else do we have that opportunity, but by teaching our children ourselves?
I'm honestly not exactly sure how this year is going to look. After taking a good look at my kids, and Bella especially, and how they learn...then taking a look at our goals for their education, and our own personalities, we've decided to go the home-centered route. And, honestly, It's pretty much the way I do things naturally anyway. I've always been one to teach my kids no matter where we were.
At the grocery store we can count, pick out shapes, name colors, read labels, etc.
Outside, we like to play, but sometimes we run into a very teachable moment (like observing eggs in a bird nest), or gardening with mommy,or working out in the garage with daddy.
Chores, cooking, art, everything is a learning opportunity. When I've gotten away from this, I've gotten stressed out. When I try to go by the books, my kids either get bored or they get frustrated. We all do much better when I simply challenge them where they are, and once they've mastered something, I challenge them more.
 |
| Balian using dinosaurs to identify his lower-case letters/sounds |
Do you see how this all fits in with discipleship?
Whether its Charlotte Mason or Whole-Hearted Learning, it's all based on the premis that my child is a living, learning, spiritual being, not just a tank for filling with information. It's opening up the child to a world of learning. My goal is to help my children to continue to love learning as much as they do now. I want them to become avid learners. I really believe that's what God desires for all of us in education. To become good learners, so that we can be teachable, and so that we are continuous students of His Word.
There is so much that goes into home-centered learning, apart from academics. Teaching the arts. Music, artists, etc. Character training. The study of God's Word. Going on nature walks and studying God's Creation. Life skills training.
This is why I believe that discipleship is the foundation for education. Discipleship and education happen together, at the same time. When we disciple, we educate. When we educate, we disciple (whether intentionally or not).
So much of this is stuff that most homeschooling families do throughout the day anyway, but they may not be super-intentional, or may not have the perception that all of these things add up to education, rather than being entirely separate entities.
Don't take me the wrong way. Academics are important too; however, I'm more interested in if my child is really learning, than what academic level is printed on the front of their books. I would rather Bella really learn something, and have it stick, then just simply learn something for a test, and then forget it entirely. I don't just want her learning fact after fact after fact. I want her to live it and breathe it.
Kind of like with Jesus...
I want her to touch the difference between a frog and a toad, not just read that a frog has slimy skin, and a toad has rough,dry skin. And if we can't touch a frog or a toad, then I want her to read about them in a way that captures her imagination, rather than just spit out facts and answers.
I want Bella, Balian, and Isaiah to love God. I don't just want them to know facts about Him, or have a million different Bible verses memorized by the time they graduate High School. I want them to know Him personally; to experience His presence; to stand in awe of His Majesty. I want them to know that they know that they know - not just because they have it memorized, but because they have learned to live it out in every area of their lives.
Obviously, there's only so much I can do in this area. I can't MAKE them love God. Even God himself can't do that. I can't bring them to a place of salvation - that is accomplished only by the work of the Holy Spirit in their hearts. But I can show them by how I live that I love God - and I can teach them about my Savior by getting into His Word with them. I can teach them how to worship by being a worshiper. I can teach them how to pray by being an example of prayer. And hopefully, by seeing my love for the Lord, they will desire to love the Lord as well. Until then, I will be standing on faith, and kneeling in prayer for the Holy Spirit to do a work in their hearts - to bring them into a place of repentance, salvation, and that they would have hearts that are set on fire for God.
Bella is a free spirit, and Balian is a kid that is so full of energy, I can barely keep up with him. Both of them are so full of life! And God made them that way! To make them learn in the traditional sense, would, I believe, squeeze the beauty out of the way God created them. I want to teach them in a way that causes their personalities that God gave them to shine - and to develop into what He wants them to be.
 |
| One of Bella's reading lessons from "Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons". |
Yes, there are subjects that require more structure, like math, reading, and writing. With these I have learned that short lessons are the best way to hold their attention.
Math: 15 minutes.
Reading: 15-20 minutes.
Writing: 10 minutes.
What I have seen is that they learn to focus for that small amount of time to where that time spent is more productive than an hour of struggling...where no learning happens. They remember when they pay attention. Things stick better, and they master things more easily. I am at a place where I just have to say "no thank-you" to pulling teeth to get a child to read and write. That in no way instills a love of learning. Instead, it causes a child to think that learning is boring, tedious, and altogether a negative experience.
 |
| A copy-work lesson taken from the reading assignment above. |
However, that's not to say that we shouldn't train children in diligence. Sometimes even a 10 minute lesson in copy work(writing) takes a reminder to do our best work without dawdling or wasting time. But diligence is much more easily taught in a 10 minute lesson than a longer lesson that becomes a burden to finish. As time goes on these lessons will increase in duration as each child is able to pay attention for longer periods of time.
So what we are doing is basing our learning not on how much we get done in a lesson (thinking that we must complete a certain amount of pages per day, etc.), but how completely a child understands, as well as the quality of work that is finished. It's mastery-based learning at its finest. They will not move on to the next thing until I know for sure that they grasp a concept fully. They "master" one thing before moving on to the next thing. The beauty of this is two-fold. If they need more work in one area, then you have the freedom to stay there for a while until they really get it. The other advantage is that if the child grasps the concept quickly, you don't have to stay on that concept and bore the child to death. You can move on when they are ready. So each child is able to work at their own pace. More challenging for quick learners, and less frustrating for slower learners.
So how do we fit it all in? Math, reading, writing, art, music, bible,science, and history, as well as so many other things like running a household...and how in the world do you do it with 3 children who aren't even all doing "school" yet?
I mean, I still have to feed them, for goodness sake!
What does it really look like in a tangible way?
What are we actually using for curriculum?
I'll answer those questions next time, as well as give a lot of useful resources, so keep your eye out for Homeschool Decisions, Part 3: How?
* For more information on the different homeschool approaches, go to the Simply Charlotte Mason website.
They do a good job with giving unbiased (more detailed) information about each approach, as well as some places to get more information about other approaches as well.
Or get your hands on Educating the Whole-hearted Child by Clay and Sally Clarkson. They do an excellent job of describing, in detail, the differences between ALL of the homeschool approaches. An excellent resource for beginning home-schoolers! (I talk about the book in this post, if you want to read that as well.)
Friday, June 1, 2012
Word for Word - God is Big
As we are talking about God over lunch, I was telling the kids that when there are thunderstorms, it reminds me just how big God is. When I hear the BOOM of the thunder, and I see the flashes of lightning, it makes me stand in awe of how BIG my God is...
Bella: You know, Mommy, God is WAY bigger than you.
Me: He sure is!
Bella: Yeah, He's so big He can't even fit in our house! If he came into our house, He would have to bend over, like this (showing me by demonstration) and He couldn't stand up strait!
...we proceeded to talk about how God CAN fit into our house...how He lives in our hearts because of the Holy Spirit...
I just love a 5-year-old's perception of big.
Big = bigger than mommy
Big = bigger than my house
Perhaps that will translate eventually into...
Bigger than my circumstances...
Bigger than myself...
Bigger than my enemies...
Bigger than my sin...
Little words throughout the day can plant so much that God can grow into something bigger.
Yes. God is BIG.
Bella: You know, Mommy, God is WAY bigger than you.
Me: He sure is!
Bella: Yeah, He's so big He can't even fit in our house! If he came into our house, He would have to bend over, like this (showing me by demonstration) and He couldn't stand up strait!
...we proceeded to talk about how God CAN fit into our house...how He lives in our hearts because of the Holy Spirit...
I just love a 5-year-old's perception of big.
Big = bigger than mommy
Big = bigger than my house
Perhaps that will translate eventually into...
Bigger than my circumstances...
Bigger than myself...
Bigger than my enemies...
Bigger than my sin...
Little words throughout the day can plant so much that God can grow into something bigger.
Yes. God is BIG.
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
Learning to Dance
"What does it mean to be saved?
Isn't more than just a prayer to pray,
more than just a way to Heaven?
What does it mean to be His,
to be formed in his likeness,
to know that we have a purpose?
To be salt and light in the world, to the world
To be salt and light in the world.
Let the redeemed of the Lord say so..."
Driving down Hwy 377 from Ft. Worth to our home in Granbury, the kids and I were listening to this song (by Israel Houghton) and singing along...they wanted to sing it over and over and over...
Bella was shouting it out at the top of her lungs:
"I am redeemed, I am redeemed...."
My heart begins to burst as I think about what God is going to do in the hearts of my children.
Then I get overwhelmed with Joy and Humbled by the fact that He has called me - ME - to disciple my children and raise them up to be the men and women that God has called them to be.
I let that sink in a little...
How in the world is that possible?
I have been given the greatest mission in the entire world - to raise up an army for the Lord.
It is a huge responsibility. Showing Jesus to them every day in such a way that they long to know the Lord - to be one of the Redeemed of the Lord. Teaching them to be salt and light to the world.
This doesn't happen by going to church, dropping them off at the nursery or their respective classes, and expecting them to be taught the Word of God.
It happens at home. It happens at the grocery store. It happens at the park. It happens when we're together at other's houses. It happens in vans driving down the highway.
It happens when they mess up. It happens when they do something worthy of praise. It happens in all of those moments in between.
It happens every possible moment of every day.
That's Discipleship.
After all, that's what Jesus did. The disciples went with him everywhere He went. They witnessed how he cared for others and served others, how he depended on the Father, trusted the Father, submitted to the Father's will, and sacrificed. How he forgave. How he taught God's Word. Jesus used everyday interactions and everyday illustrations to show these 12 men who God was...and who HE was. I'm planning on studying more about this for the summer - How Jesus taught the 12. Perhaps that will give me a better idea on how I am to teach the 3 that have been put under my care.
Yes, I'm prepared for my toes to be stepped all over.
But God gives us wisdom when we ask.
Then, the beautiful thing is that as we come to know Him more, His desires become our desires, and our desires transform into His desires as we continue in this wonderful dance with the Lord.
My dance with the Lord is where teaching my children begins. I learn the steps, then I teach it to them. I learn the rhythm and I teach them the rhythm. I learn how to follow His lead, and I teach them how to follow His lead. I do this until they come to the place of knowing the Savior. They spend time dancing with Him on their own. They learn their own special steps and their own special rhythm to their own special dance with Him. Then after learning the steps, following His lead, and flowing with the rhythm, they come to know him more everyday, until they know Him so intimately that they are able to let go, and get lost in His eyes, as the world around them fades away.
When we are lost in His eyes, the things of the world don't matter.
When we are lost in His eyes, anything can happen.
When we are lost in His eyes, He can use us wherever we are to do things we never thought possible.
We just have to learn to dance.
Isn't more than just a prayer to pray,
more than just a way to Heaven?
What does it mean to be His,
to be formed in his likeness,
to know that we have a purpose?
To be salt and light in the world, to the world
To be salt and light in the world.
Let the redeemed of the Lord say so..."
Driving down Hwy 377 from Ft. Worth to our home in Granbury, the kids and I were listening to this song (by Israel Houghton) and singing along...they wanted to sing it over and over and over...
Bella was shouting it out at the top of her lungs:
"I am redeemed, I am redeemed...."
My heart begins to burst as I think about what God is going to do in the hearts of my children.
Then I get overwhelmed with Joy and Humbled by the fact that He has called me - ME - to disciple my children and raise them up to be the men and women that God has called them to be.
I let that sink in a little...
How in the world is that possible?
I have been given the greatest mission in the entire world - to raise up an army for the Lord.
It is a huge responsibility. Showing Jesus to them every day in such a way that they long to know the Lord - to be one of the Redeemed of the Lord. Teaching them to be salt and light to the world.
This doesn't happen by going to church, dropping them off at the nursery or their respective classes, and expecting them to be taught the Word of God.
It happens at home. It happens at the grocery store. It happens at the park. It happens when we're together at other's houses. It happens in vans driving down the highway.
It happens when they mess up. It happens when they do something worthy of praise. It happens in all of those moments in between.
It happens every possible moment of every day.
That's Discipleship.
After all, that's what Jesus did. The disciples went with him everywhere He went. They witnessed how he cared for others and served others, how he depended on the Father, trusted the Father, submitted to the Father's will, and sacrificed. How he forgave. How he taught God's Word. Jesus used everyday interactions and everyday illustrations to show these 12 men who God was...and who HE was. I'm planning on studying more about this for the summer - How Jesus taught the 12. Perhaps that will give me a better idea on how I am to teach the 3 that have been put under my care.
Yes, I'm prepared for my toes to be stepped all over.
But God gives us wisdom when we ask.
Then, the beautiful thing is that as we come to know Him more, His desires become our desires, and our desires transform into His desires as we continue in this wonderful dance with the Lord.
My dance with the Lord is where teaching my children begins. I learn the steps, then I teach it to them. I learn the rhythm and I teach them the rhythm. I learn how to follow His lead, and I teach them how to follow His lead. I do this until they come to the place of knowing the Savior. They spend time dancing with Him on their own. They learn their own special steps and their own special rhythm to their own special dance with Him. Then after learning the steps, following His lead, and flowing with the rhythm, they come to know him more everyday, until they know Him so intimately that they are able to let go, and get lost in His eyes, as the world around them fades away.
When we are lost in His eyes, the things of the world don't matter.
When we are lost in His eyes, anything can happen.
When we are lost in His eyes, He can use us wherever we are to do things we never thought possible.
We just have to learn to dance.
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
What I'm Reading Now: Educating the Wholehearted Child
So here's a really random story:
I was grocery shopping. Isaiah was on my back, and the other two littles were in the basket. *I hardly ever go grocery shopping with all the little ones with me. I usually go grocery shopping on Friday mornings, when Neil is home, because well, especially these days, grocery shopping is a pretty big job...
So, I'm at the grocery store on a Tuesday morning with all 3 children.
Out of nowhere, this girl about my age comes up to me and asks
"Hey, did you sing at the Aarron Gomas (benefit concert) thing?"
I had, in fact, sung at the benefit concert with our praise team. But our conversation didn't end there. She then starts asking if I home-schooled. I'm sure by looking at my very tall daughter in the cart, and being a Tuesday morning, it was probably a safe assumption. But most people don't just look at your kids and assume all of a sudden that you home-school.
We got to talking and she also has 3 children, kind of around the same age as ours. They home school as well.
As we continue talking I know that this was no accident. It was a divine appointment that only God could have orchestrated.
Really, I was at a point of just needing wisdom and encouragement with homeschooling. I didn't know what we were going to do with Bella next year for school...and well...we really need to decide now. I was super stressed out about it.
Should we do Kindergarten or First grade?
Should we get her tested?
Should we do full home school, or should we do the university model homeschooling (going to a "private school" 2-3 days a week for 4-5 hours those days, and doing work at home as well)?
Is it possible to do full homeschooling at home with 2 small boys?
If we school at home full-time, where do I even begin with a curriculum? We've tried so many, it seems, and haven't really liked any of them.
The reason I was burdened was just because I really feel like God has shown me through his Word what I need to be doing. I feel like I should have Bella home full-time. I just kept looking at the obstacles. In my flesh, I wanted to give in. I wanted to send her away for a couple of hours a week, so I could "make sure to get one-on-one time with the boys", and possibly get a little bit of a "break". But really, those were just excuses. In reality, I wanted to give in so that somebody else could choose the curriculum for me, and just tell me what I needed to do.
Pretty much I was giving in because it just seemed too hard.
I wanted to be spoon-fed instead of relying on the Spirit of God and His Strength and Wisdom for our family.
But all the while, the Holy Spirit has been tugging at me. Reminding me why we chose home school in the first-place: So that Neil and I could be the most prominent influence in our children's lives. So that we could instill the Word of God into every part of our children's lives as God's Word grows and is taking over every part of our lives. And doing that in an environment where we aren't competing with the value system of the world day in and day out.
Back to my story. So this girl I met at the grocery store, after our conversation, finds me on Facebook, and sends me a wealth of information that she had found. I told her I just felt overwhelmed.
Then she sent me this book recommendation. I had no idea what it really was, but got it anyway.
I'm so glad that I did.
I feel like I'm reading a Bible study specifically made for home educators. Encouragement. Scripture references everywhere.
But really, what I love is that they get to the heart of homeschooling.
"Your overriding goal should be to raise spiritually mature children who have both the will and the skill to learn and the desire and ability to keep learning...to raise well-rounded, spiritually grounded, truth-founded Christian children whose goal in life is to make a difference for the kingdom of God, whatever life path they choose."
They talk about how "home school" is just an extension of nurturing and discipling your children in your home. It all fits together in a beautiful, God-intended way.
And that is where my heart has been led. And that's why I've been stressed-out. Because even with present-day homeschooling, so much of it looks so similar to what they would receive in a classroom. Curricula coming out of your ears. Too many options. Stressing about if I'll do a good enough job in teaching them.
The problem is that I was still looking to the standards, philosophies, and thinking of the world.
My standard should be higher.
There isn't really a lot of mentioning of education in scripture. But we know that Jewish boys were sent to synagogue school - and had to memorize the entire Torah! They memorized it so that they could then dig deeper into God's word and apply it...and for those who were so gifted - teach it.
But we also can see how much was taught in the home. Just simply looking at Deuteronomy 6 shows how God wants us to teach our children - in everything we do - day in and day out - no matter where we are or what we are doing.
"The LORD is our God, the LORD is one! You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and hen you rise up. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand and they shall be as frontals on your forehead. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates." Deuteronomy 6:4-9And that's what I long to do.
I am, by no stretch of the imagination, there yet.
Honestly, right now, I'm still seeking wisdom on what specifically to do for school next year.
But that's just the tip of the iceberg.
God is showing me so much in such a small amount of time on how he wants me to disciple my children.
That it is a mission field.
That it is a sacrifice.
It takes dying to self in every area of my life, because I am to be an example of Christ to them.
It's dying to self, taking up my cross, and following Christ the same way I would if God called me to minister to anyone outside of my family.
It doesn't mean I'm perfect, and lack of perfection is that much more of an opportunity to share Christ with my children. To humble myself yet again, and ask for forgiveness.
So it's like I've had this big-picture idea of what God wants for us, but I've had no idea how to get there.
Seems like this book is a great start.
And I never would have known about it without the help of my new friend I met at the grocery store :)
"My God shall supply all your need." Philippians 4:19
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Being a Mom
This is a great Mom video showing the hard work of moms behind the scenes every day... I like it :)
Of course, it doesn't hurt that it's a commercial for P&G, and well, we have two family members that work for them - Neil's dad and brother :)
The point is that you never know how much the work that you do day in and day out will pay off in the long-run. We have no idea who our children will become - what influence they will have in the world. Whether they become a sport star and have a very high platform to speak from to the multitudes, or whether they are unknown by the masses, yet known to those with whom they will share the Gospel with - or be an example of Christ-like character - in America, or on the mission-field elsewhere....we just never know how us pouring into our kids will someday impact other people.
It's another reminder that my mission field right now - my children - is so vitally important. It isn't just for my kids - it's for everyone that my kids are able to reach as well.
Being a mom is a big job, but the greatest calling in the world.
"Watch and be amazed. For I will do something in your days that you would not believe, even if you were told." Habakkuk 1:5
Of course, it doesn't hurt that it's a commercial for P&G, and well, we have two family members that work for them - Neil's dad and brother :)
The point is that you never know how much the work that you do day in and day out will pay off in the long-run. We have no idea who our children will become - what influence they will have in the world. Whether they become a sport star and have a very high platform to speak from to the multitudes, or whether they are unknown by the masses, yet known to those with whom they will share the Gospel with - or be an example of Christ-like character - in America, or on the mission-field elsewhere....we just never know how us pouring into our kids will someday impact other people.
It's another reminder that my mission field right now - my children - is so vitally important. It isn't just for my kids - it's for everyone that my kids are able to reach as well.
Being a mom is a big job, but the greatest calling in the world.
"Watch and be amazed. For I will do something in your days that you would not believe, even if you were told." Habakkuk 1:5
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Monday, February 20, 2012
Gleaning
The Lord is filling me to overflowing.
Is it possible to stop time just to be able to take it all in and really chew on everything that He's teaching me?
The past couple of weeks, I have been bombarded almost with opportunities to glean what others have planted as far as how to better disciple my children.
I've been amazed as I have witnessed the possibilities.
From Bible lessons to memory verses. From activities together to teaching children the discipline of spending quiet time with the Lord. A whole new world is opening up before my very eyes - a world that I not only never thought was possible, but a world that I never even knew existed - or COULD exist!
And God continues to pour out on me.
It's not a certain formula. It's an attitude of the heart.
And I'm no longer content. I'm bursting at the seams.
For the first time, I think I'm truly beginning to understand the calling of motherhood.
The gravity of that calling.
The legacy that living out that calling can mean.
and what does it mean to leave a legacy?
When your sons and daughters can glean what you have learned the hard way. When they "just know" how to truly teach their children how to walk in the Lord because they are simply repeating what was taught to them.
That is a legacy. And there is something amazing about that.
Because unless we choose to be different, to stop what has been done generation after generation...the natural thing to do is repeat what we know. repeat what we have been taught. We, as parents, tend to repeat how we were parented. Sometimes it isn't a good thing. However, when children are taught the Word of God and are taught how to apply the Word of God to their lives, that will be what they repeat with their children.
"Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." (Proverbs 22:6)
Nobody is perfect. Nobody does it perfectly. We all need the Grace of God everyday to empower us to do anything good.
And that's where it has to start. Everyday surrendering my heart - my thoughts, my words, and my deeds - my attitude, and my mood - fully to Him - so that He can give me the full measure of Grace that I need for that day. It's learning what true love is - putting others first. Putting our children before ourselves. Choosing Joy. Choosing contentment. Jesus knows that I am so far from attaining this that it almost seems as far as east is from the west. But through Him, nothing is impossible, and as far as the east is from the west is how far he has already cast my sin.
It's an attitude of the heart. And being filled with the Holy Spirit anew every day.
His mercies are new every morning.
"Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds...teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home, when you walk along the road, when you lie down, and when you get up."
-Deuteronomy 11:18-19
Is it possible to stop time just to be able to take it all in and really chew on everything that He's teaching me?
The past couple of weeks, I have been bombarded almost with opportunities to glean what others have planted as far as how to better disciple my children.
I've been amazed as I have witnessed the possibilities.
From Bible lessons to memory verses. From activities together to teaching children the discipline of spending quiet time with the Lord. A whole new world is opening up before my very eyes - a world that I not only never thought was possible, but a world that I never even knew existed - or COULD exist!
And God continues to pour out on me.
It's not a certain formula. It's an attitude of the heart.
And I'm no longer content. I'm bursting at the seams.
For the first time, I think I'm truly beginning to understand the calling of motherhood.
The gravity of that calling.
The legacy that living out that calling can mean.
and what does it mean to leave a legacy?
When your sons and daughters can glean what you have learned the hard way. When they "just know" how to truly teach their children how to walk in the Lord because they are simply repeating what was taught to them.
That is a legacy. And there is something amazing about that.
Because unless we choose to be different, to stop what has been done generation after generation...the natural thing to do is repeat what we know. repeat what we have been taught. We, as parents, tend to repeat how we were parented. Sometimes it isn't a good thing. However, when children are taught the Word of God and are taught how to apply the Word of God to their lives, that will be what they repeat with their children.
"Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." (Proverbs 22:6)
Nobody is perfect. Nobody does it perfectly. We all need the Grace of God everyday to empower us to do anything good.
And that's where it has to start. Everyday surrendering my heart - my thoughts, my words, and my deeds - my attitude, and my mood - fully to Him - so that He can give me the full measure of Grace that I need for that day. It's learning what true love is - putting others first. Putting our children before ourselves. Choosing Joy. Choosing contentment. Jesus knows that I am so far from attaining this that it almost seems as far as east is from the west. But through Him, nothing is impossible, and as far as the east is from the west is how far he has already cast my sin.
It's an attitude of the heart. And being filled with the Holy Spirit anew every day.
His mercies are new every morning.
"Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds...teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home, when you walk along the road, when you lie down, and when you get up."
-Deuteronomy 11:18-19
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
Responsibility? What's that?
I've been searching for responsibility charts for my kiddos, but I haven't found one that I like. Neil and I don't like the idea of rewarding our kids for things that they are expected to do as part of a contributing member of our family. However, I do like keeping a record - if for no other reason than the child being able to see what they have and have not accomplished. Perhaps not now, but eventually, we want to reward them (with money) for chores above and beyond their normal duties. And we want to use this as a tool for teaching money management - saving, tithing, and spending wisely.
Well today I found a stinkin' awesome tool to do this. It incorporates all of this. A list of chores each child is expected to do as a contributing member of the family, the chores that they can choose to do for pay, accountability for doing those tasks and reporting it (kinda like a time card, so to speak), and then how to manage the money they are given on their "payday". If you want to buy it, you can. I think it's about $40 or so. I think I'll use this as a guide to make a system for our family. Either way, I think it's great. check it out:
Fisher Kids Responsibility System
Well today I found a stinkin' awesome tool to do this. It incorporates all of this. A list of chores each child is expected to do as a contributing member of the family, the chores that they can choose to do for pay, accountability for doing those tasks and reporting it (kinda like a time card, so to speak), and then how to manage the money they are given on their "payday". If you want to buy it, you can. I think it's about $40 or so. I think I'll use this as a guide to make a system for our family. Either way, I think it's great. check it out:
Fisher Kids Responsibility System
Sunday, January 29, 2012
Search. Prune. Change. Repeat.
"Search me, oh God, and know my heart.
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting."
Psalm 139:23-24
Change begins with me.
Sounds logical. Almost a no-brainer. Of course it does. Even sounds easy.
But it's hard to change when you don't know what needs to be changed.
When you're sick, you see the symptoms. Your throat hurts. You can't breathe through your nose. Your head hurts. You may have fever. The symptoms get worse. You see the symptoms, and you know that there is a problem, so you try to fix it in every way you know how. You use Halls drops, Chloriseptic spray, Tylenol, take more vitamin C, do nasal rinses - the whole shabang. Some things seem to work, but only for a while, and then you just feel lousy again. The symptoms never go away for good. You get frustrated because by golly, you are doing everything that you know to do, but nothing will shake this thing! Why can't I shake this thing? You call the doctor and tell him your symptoms. You're hoping he can just give you a prescription over the phone so that you can start feeling better now. You've looked up all your symptoms online, and you're pretty sure you know what the problem is, so you give him your opinion as well.
The problem, however, is that no matter how much you tell him about the symptoms, he can't make you better until you go see him and he examines you and diagnoses the problem. Sure, you can tell him what YOU think it is, but only he knows how to make you better.
You know where I'm going with this...but here's my story anyway...
After Balian was born, I went through a really rough time. I struggled with PPD in the form of irritability and anger. But for some reason I would only take it out on my baby girl, Bella.
At first, every time I screamed at her, or was just down-right mean to her, I would be horrified, and I would go in my bathroom and cry my eyes out. As time went on, it was "like" I was getting calloused to it...but I wasn't. I thought I was getting better, but I wasn't. The other PPD symptoms left - my hormones seemed to be regulated, but one thing remained: anger. And I was always angry at Bella. Always. I saw everything negative. All I saw was what she did wrong - her misbehavior - her disobedience. So I tried to fix that, but to no avail. I still got angry. She still disrespected me. And I got more angry. I yelled, when I never yelled before. And why did I always feel so angry still? I was never an angry person. I felt so incredibly stressed out - why? It just didn't all make sense.
I was meeting with the Lord, and learning and growing a lot. I would talk God's ear off about all of these symptoms. I just wanted to be back to normal. I wanted to get better. I wanted the symptoms to go away. Can my compliant, obedient baby girl come back? I didn't want the stress. I didn't like being angry. I asked God to take the anger. I felt like I truly gave it to him. But it was still the same.
Through prayer one day, I was asking God what it was that I do differently now in my parenting than I did when Bella was younger. He led me to go back and look at some transcripts from Elizabeth Elliot's radio show Gateway to Joy, which I had read in the early days for encouragement in motherhood. And in one of her transcripts about teaching children obedience, she talked about how if a parent has a problem with anger toward their children, then it's possible that the parent has some unforgiveness in their heart - causing bitterness to take root.
That struck me. I've been so angry. But I'm not a person to hold grudges. My feelings may be hurt by someone, and it may take me a while to get over that hurt, but I'm quick to pardon. I thought for a while...Is there anyone I haven't forgiven? I couldn't even think of a hurt that I hadn't gotten over. Not even with Neil. Right then, I presented my thoughts to the Lord, and said "Lord, if there is someone that I need to forgive, please, please let me know." The next morning, during the sermon, I was in my own world with God. Just sitting. actually waiting and listening.
And the Holy Spirit said "You haven't forgiven yourself."
BAM! Talk about getting hit between the eyes.
Say what? "I haven't forgiven myself?"
His reply: "You haven't forgiven yourself for how you treated Bella during your time in the wilderness."
I was speechless. So I just sat and listened more. He continued to reveal everything. And it all made so much sense.
I was angry, and at the time I felt like I couldn't control it, I was so mean to Bella. It horrified me. Every angry word, every hurtful action - it stuck with me. The tears may have left, but the guilt didn't.
Even when the "wilderness" was over, and I felt like God had given me victory, I couldn't be totally healed, because I was still carrying around the guilt and the shame. Every time I looked at Bella, I was disgusted with myself. How could I have treated her so horribly? And I knew that I was the cause of her misbehavior. I was looking into a mirror. So I got angry with myself...and continued to project that anger on Bella.
It doesn't make sense at all...and yet it totally makes sense.
I just never thought it could run that deep.
It's amazing what a little bit of Holy Spirit clarity can do.
No longer treating the symptoms, but rather treating the root of the problem.
It wasn't Bella's behavior. It was mine...but instead of letting go of the guilt, I held onto it with clinched fists.
I couldn't just talk to the Doctor. I had to let him examine me. So that he could tell me the True diagnosis.
So that I could forgive and let go.
I'm working on that one.
And God is making some pretty big changes as I work through it.
Praise God for his never-ending love. He is always good.
"Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness."
Lamentations 3:22-23
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Fruit of the Spirit?
Have you ever looked back and reminisced about an earlier time in your life when you felt more holy? I find myself doing that a lot. I look back at my days in college. I think "Now that's what living for Jesus looks like!" I think about being on leadership team at the Wesley Foundation. I think about doing spontaneous worship at the park, meeting with my accountability girls, going to small group, studying God's Word, doing servant evangelism, and not being shy about meeting new people and talking to them about the Lord. I was in a place where I was ready to drop everything for the purpose of spreading the Gospel. My senior year I was seriously looking into doing a Discipleship Training School (DTS) with Youth with a Mission (YWAM) and just going wherever the Lord lead me from there. I was sold out.
Then, I wake up to my life today. I've been married for a little over 5 years, and I'm a stay-at-home mom with 3 kids all 4years and under. I wake up to the sound of little ones squealing and playing, so I stomp into their room and say "Don't you realize that your brother is still sleeping? quiet down!" My famous words are "stop that! be nice! say you're sorry. come here. go to time out. what are you doing? no hit. no kick." and my activities include cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, changing diapers, nursing the baby, grocery shopping, disciplining, teaching school, and the like.
What happened to being on fire for God?
I have a problem. It's called selfishness.
When I look back at my life in college, for some reason, I forget to look at the fact that I was the one and only person that I was responsible for... and the selfish person inside of me thinks that means that life was better. easier. and I could do a heck of a lot more for the Kingdom.
Oh, I've seen those women - some of them my friends - that seem to "get" this whole motherhood thing. They honestly see the joy in raising their kids - are never bitter, harsh, or resentful - and have such peace about simply being a stay-at-home mom and nothing more at the moment - because their children are their mission field.
Oh, that I was that person! Instead, I have to admit that I have been the opposite. frustrated. resentful. bitter. wishing for something "better". I've had this almost constant headache and backache that I feel when I'm stressed out. my attitude stinks. I keep thinking of what I can do outside of my home to serve the Lord. Who can I serve? What can I do? And I keep thinking that I'm lacking purpose. If only I had some grand purpose for the Kingdom, then maybe I could stop feeling so frustrated. Maybe I could actually pour out what has been coming in, so that I can stop going stale.
Then one day it started hitting me. I was thinking about the Fruit of the Spirit.
love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.
Then I started thinking....
I tell my children that we should love one another...but am I good about showing THEM love? In the way they feel loved?
I ask Bella to obey in a happy way, but am I cheerfully serving them today?
Am I at peace with where I am right now?
I tell Bella and Balian to be patient for this or that, but am I patient with them...or do I tell them to hurry up and do, well...everything?
I tell them to be kind, but am I an example of kindness or do I snap at them for little things?
I tell them that they need to obey mommy and daddy so that they can learn to obey God, but am I being obedient to what God has told me to do?
I tell Bella and Balian to be gentle with each other and with Isaiah...but am I gentle with them?
When Balian throws fits, I ask him to show me self-control...but do I show self-control when I don't get MY way?
I know that I am human, and I won't ever be perfect. But this is selfishness, pure and simple. I'm selfish with my thoughts, words, and deeds. I want to do what I want to do, and if somebody tries to change my agenda, it's not going to be pretty.
But what I've realized is that it all boils down to not understanding and living within my calling. Rather than living like my children are a Blessing, I have lived as if they are a burden. Not that I would ever say that if you asked me, but my actions have proven otherwise.
What I'm starting to really grasp, is just how intentionally God put me where I am. Because, you see, He didn't give me his blessing to go on and do YWAM. Instead, he helped me to realize that this incredible guy that had been my friend for over 3 years was the man he wanted me to marry. And he Blessed us with 3 beautiful children that He is trusting us to teach about His ways. Instead of traveling around leading worship, He opened the doors for me to lead worship wherever I have lived...Louisiana, New York, Connecticut, Georgia/Florida, Texas...with my family. And He has shown me that unless I am content with and faithful to do what He has called me to do at home, then I won't be content and faithful anywhere else either.
I forget exactly what Elizabeth Elliott said regarding this but it went something like this...If you're asking God for the next thing...how you should serve him, and you aren't getting an answer...then just do what you already know to do - the best you can do it, for His Glory.
So perhaps the reason I've been so discontented and frustrated is that I've been grieving the Holy Spirit - because I haven't been the missionary He called me to be. Perhaps instead of looking outward at what I could do for the Lord, I should simply be looking inward - making sure that my heart is where it needs to be to serve the Lord with gladness everyday I roll out of my bed and enter into my mission field of little ones. How's my attitude? Am I displaying the Fruit of the Spirit? Am I presenting the Gospel today with my actions? Am I serving cheerfully? Would he say "well done, good and faithful servant?"
My hope, and my prayer, is simply to remember that I need the Holy Spirit's help in every way imaginable in this mission field every day. To not take this task lightly. And to see that I have been Blessed with the opportunity to share the gospel everyday with these little ones that are so dear to the Father.
Then, I wake up to my life today. I've been married for a little over 5 years, and I'm a stay-at-home mom with 3 kids all 4years and under. I wake up to the sound of little ones squealing and playing, so I stomp into their room and say "Don't you realize that your brother is still sleeping? quiet down!" My famous words are "stop that! be nice! say you're sorry. come here. go to time out. what are you doing? no hit. no kick." and my activities include cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, changing diapers, nursing the baby, grocery shopping, disciplining, teaching school, and the like.
What happened to being on fire for God?
I have a problem. It's called selfishness.
When I look back at my life in college, for some reason, I forget to look at the fact that I was the one and only person that I was responsible for... and the selfish person inside of me thinks that means that life was better. easier. and I could do a heck of a lot more for the Kingdom.
Oh, I've seen those women - some of them my friends - that seem to "get" this whole motherhood thing. They honestly see the joy in raising their kids - are never bitter, harsh, or resentful - and have such peace about simply being a stay-at-home mom and nothing more at the moment - because their children are their mission field.
Oh, that I was that person! Instead, I have to admit that I have been the opposite. frustrated. resentful. bitter. wishing for something "better". I've had this almost constant headache and backache that I feel when I'm stressed out. my attitude stinks. I keep thinking of what I can do outside of my home to serve the Lord. Who can I serve? What can I do? And I keep thinking that I'm lacking purpose. If only I had some grand purpose for the Kingdom, then maybe I could stop feeling so frustrated. Maybe I could actually pour out what has been coming in, so that I can stop going stale.
Then one day it started hitting me. I was thinking about the Fruit of the Spirit.
love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.
Then I started thinking....
I tell my children that we should love one another...but am I good about showing THEM love? In the way they feel loved?
I ask Bella to obey in a happy way, but am I cheerfully serving them today?
Am I at peace with where I am right now?
I tell Bella and Balian to be patient for this or that, but am I patient with them...or do I tell them to hurry up and do, well...everything?
I tell them to be kind, but am I an example of kindness or do I snap at them for little things?
I tell them that they need to obey mommy and daddy so that they can learn to obey God, but am I being obedient to what God has told me to do?
I tell Bella and Balian to be gentle with each other and with Isaiah...but am I gentle with them?
When Balian throws fits, I ask him to show me self-control...but do I show self-control when I don't get MY way?
I know that I am human, and I won't ever be perfect. But this is selfishness, pure and simple. I'm selfish with my thoughts, words, and deeds. I want to do what I want to do, and if somebody tries to change my agenda, it's not going to be pretty.
But what I've realized is that it all boils down to not understanding and living within my calling. Rather than living like my children are a Blessing, I have lived as if they are a burden. Not that I would ever say that if you asked me, but my actions have proven otherwise.
What I'm starting to really grasp, is just how intentionally God put me where I am. Because, you see, He didn't give me his blessing to go on and do YWAM. Instead, he helped me to realize that this incredible guy that had been my friend for over 3 years was the man he wanted me to marry. And he Blessed us with 3 beautiful children that He is trusting us to teach about His ways. Instead of traveling around leading worship, He opened the doors for me to lead worship wherever I have lived...Louisiana, New York, Connecticut, Georgia/Florida, Texas...with my family. And He has shown me that unless I am content with and faithful to do what He has called me to do at home, then I won't be content and faithful anywhere else either.
I forget exactly what Elizabeth Elliott said regarding this but it went something like this...If you're asking God for the next thing...how you should serve him, and you aren't getting an answer...then just do what you already know to do - the best you can do it, for His Glory.
So perhaps the reason I've been so discontented and frustrated is that I've been grieving the Holy Spirit - because I haven't been the missionary He called me to be. Perhaps instead of looking outward at what I could do for the Lord, I should simply be looking inward - making sure that my heart is where it needs to be to serve the Lord with gladness everyday I roll out of my bed and enter into my mission field of little ones. How's my attitude? Am I displaying the Fruit of the Spirit? Am I presenting the Gospel today with my actions? Am I serving cheerfully? Would he say "well done, good and faithful servant?"
My hope, and my prayer, is simply to remember that I need the Holy Spirit's help in every way imaginable in this mission field every day. To not take this task lightly. And to see that I have been Blessed with the opportunity to share the gospel everyday with these little ones that are so dear to the Father.
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Discoveries, Confirmations, and School
I made a fabulous discovery this past week. Well, I say that. Really, I've known it all along, but it was definitely confirmed this week. Here it is:
About 90% of Bella's disciplinary problems stem from boredom - lack of cognitive challenge and/or physical and metal stimulation.
I mean really, I've known this. The kid will wander around the house or follow me around like a puppy dog...drives me crazy... I'll tell her to go find something to do, but playing just isn't enough for her. And let's be honest - I have been horrible about challenging her. Yes, we've done "school" but not super-consistently. And once Isaiah came - yeah...didn't happen. Anyway, so on Thursday I decided to do an experiment (on my children...mwah-ha-ha!) I was going to have Bella and Balian paint, but Bella said she wanted to do play-dough...so they did play-dough at their "little table" while I was feeding Isaiah...(the first time I've included Balian) and lo and behold - they played together! they shared! there was no fighting! Bella was actually helping her brother, and Bella probably worked on play-dough for a good hour or so. seriously. Then, I tried to make a point of letting Bella do as much as she could all by herself. She made her own sandwich for lunch, cleaned up her own messes, and helped me with various things (not that she doesn't do these things on a typical day...just trying to over-emphasize it). That afternoon, I pulled out the mega-blocks, and Bella built towers for over an hour that afternoon.
Over the course of the entire day I had little to no disciplinary problems with her. I know that all of these activities seem elementary for her, but the point was that she needs direction to get her started on something, but once she got started, she would work diligently for over an hour without a fuss, a fight, or wandering around aimlessly...
The odd thing is that I suppose I have been wandering pretty aimlessly myself, so to speak. I mean, I've had this idea of what I want "school" to look like, but I haven't been able to achieve it. I tried getting a curriculum, but every day as I'm looking over the activities for the day, most of it wasn't challenging for Bella at all. And I am so not good at coming up with my own activities - that takes a special kind of creativity, and I don't have it. I actually was thinking about giving up the whole homeschooling thing for this next year and enrolling Bella into a PK-4 class. I was actually looking at some websites for some local places...but I couldn't seem to find what I was looking for. Then, just out of curiosity, I checked out the Montessori schools - and I realized then that my whole way of doing things (teaching, potty training, etc.) all seemed to be rooted in this "Montessori" approach. The ironic thing is that over a year ago my mom had given me a book called "Teaching Montessori in the Home" - I just never took the time to look at it. So I suppose a lot of my ideas about potty training and teaching my kids in general have stemmed from my mom's way of doing things, which came from the Montessori approach. Totally makes sense. The more I looked into teaching Montessori at home, the more I liked it - and the more I saw that I really could do it - and how perfect it is for ALL of the kids, because it is supposed to be used in a context of multiple ages.
So now, we have a plan for next year (or as soon as we can set it up) that is much less stressful, and much more challenging for Bella. It helps her to work at her own pace and teaches her to become self-disciplined in all that she does.
In the meantime, I'm trying to incorporate as much of the Montessori approach into everything that we do here, at home, as much as I can. Now that I know what I want, I have much more direction (and motivation) to do it.
This week we've done a lot of "small" things.
Building towers with blocks:
And learning how to set a table properly:
Bella also learned her months of the year and can officially count by 10's on her own. It always amazes me how much more easily kids learn when you put something into a song. We learned the months of the year to the tune of "5 Little Indians." The words all fit (if you add a couple of "and"s in there)and she learned it in about a day. Works for me!
January, February, March, and April
May, June, July, and August
September, October, and November
December
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Bella's Prayers
Twice this week my daughter has amazed me.
A couple days ago, I was sitting next to Bella at her "little table". I had a headache, and was holding my head in my hands.
Bella said "Mommy, does your head still hurt?"
"Yes," I reply.
"Do you want me to pray for you?" she asks.
"Sure" I say, not knowing what to expect.
she starts praying: "Thank you God for mommy's head. I pray that it wouldn't hurt and that it wouldn't be bad. In Jesus' name, Amen."
...and it felt better about an hour later. no medicine involved.
yesterday, I woke up with my left arm throbbing from my shoulder down to the tips of my fingers. I told Bella that it hurt, and I asked her to pray for me.
"ok, mommy, close your eyes!" she says.
"ok, Bella." And I did.
She prays, "Thank you God for mommy's arm feeling better. I pray that it wouldn't be bad anymore. In the name of Jesus we pray, Amen."
again...about an hour later...it was better without the help of medicine.
What amazes me about the first prayer is that she initiated everything about it. She asked to pray for me, and she did. Sometimes it's difficult to get her to pray before dinner or bed, but by golly, she'll pray when you really need her to!
What amazes me about the second prayer is her words!! She prayed EXPECTING God to make my arm better. "Thank you, God for mommy's arm feeling better..." She was thanking Him for doing something that he hadn't done yet - expecting Him to do what she was asking. That's pretty amazing for a 3-yr. old...especially since I wonder if I have really been much of an example of that...
we may have a prayer warrior in our midst!
A couple days ago, I was sitting next to Bella at her "little table". I had a headache, and was holding my head in my hands.
Bella said "Mommy, does your head still hurt?"
"Yes," I reply.
"Do you want me to pray for you?" she asks.
"Sure" I say, not knowing what to expect.
she starts praying: "Thank you God for mommy's head. I pray that it wouldn't hurt and that it wouldn't be bad. In Jesus' name, Amen."
...and it felt better about an hour later. no medicine involved.
yesterday, I woke up with my left arm throbbing from my shoulder down to the tips of my fingers. I told Bella that it hurt, and I asked her to pray for me.
"ok, mommy, close your eyes!" she says.
"ok, Bella." And I did.
She prays, "Thank you God for mommy's arm feeling better. I pray that it wouldn't be bad anymore. In the name of Jesus we pray, Amen."
again...about an hour later...it was better without the help of medicine.
What amazes me about the first prayer is that she initiated everything about it. She asked to pray for me, and she did. Sometimes it's difficult to get her to pray before dinner or bed, but by golly, she'll pray when you really need her to!
What amazes me about the second prayer is her words!! She prayed EXPECTING God to make my arm better. "Thank you, God for mommy's arm feeling better..." She was thanking Him for doing something that he hadn't done yet - expecting Him to do what she was asking. That's pretty amazing for a 3-yr. old...especially since I wonder if I have really been much of an example of that...
we may have a prayer warrior in our midst!
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
The Mom Song
So I was listening to the radio today, and they played this song, and I thought it was fabulous. Thought I'd share :)
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